Holy shit, Obama's knee went to Columbia? Now mine feel all inadequate... and knobbly.

It was definitely time for some thrilling heroics.

After the October 24th incident, the police officer, recovering from a sedative, was heard to say "I was aimin' for his head!"

I think it must be genetic—I never took any heat for it, but my ears are ever-so-slightly pointy too. Their pointiness is actually emphasized by the fact that we have tiny little attached earlobes. I think it's definitely genetic. My Mum has tiny round ears, my Dad little pointy ones, and I have itty-bitty…

I take entirely too much pride in these facts, though I recognize it is decidedly not logical.

My Dad totally has ears that are naturally a little pointy. It is awesome. It's doubly awesome due to the fact that my Grampy seriously resembles Leonard Nimoy—my Dad is the Son of Spock!

*Cough*Dubya*/Cough*

How in hell is Tuxie not winning? Get the hell in there people—for our cats!!

@emarific: Marriage was a political and financial arrangement just as much, and probably more, than it was a religious one historically. I'm not willing to surrender this one to them. My parents are married—they got married in a courthouse, they're atheists, and they're married. Many of my gay friends are also marri…

Those actually aren't approved by Bill Waterson—he finds them appalling.

WTF, Momma Giraffe has my name? Damnit universe, if I told you once, I told you a thousand times—now is not a good time for me to procreate! It doesn't matter how many adorable animals with my name give birth, it is highly unlikely that I shall do so!

Holy crap, this really is hate on teachers month on Jez—I understand that teachers sometimes do awful things, but this is sort of a constant bombardment. Where are you getting all of these stories, anyway? Teacherssuck.com?

Hahahah, she's like "Momma squish you now, 'kay?"

Holy crap. That is so bad for my computer screen, yet so very good for me.

Hell yes to this. I think some female leaders would be more reflective of the way things would break down in the real world, too—I know plenty of women who are seriously inclined to take charge in a crisis, and do a damn good job of it. I'd love to see that in a zombie film (hell, I'd love to see it in any film).

@Snarfblat: Oh great, now I'm trying to bite my computer screen. I don't even know where my damn screen cleaner is!

You'd get better... (But, in all seriousness, I am also team Tuxie. Hellz yeah!)

The problem with this particular April Fool's joke is that it's not plausible enough to be a Poe.

Just to add a visual aid in favour of tuxies: I give you Sancho, relaxing with/annoying/being annoyed by his slightly more casual brother, Kublai Khan.

TUXEDOOOOOOOOOOOO! Commander Samuel "Sancho" Vimes would like all of you to know that there can be no other outcome in this fight. He may be part Maine Coon, but is all class.