I’ve read similar advice before and I’m convinced that I must be doing coffee wrong. I will try better quality beans next time. Also, I’m thinking about experimenting with different brewing techniques (I have a basic drip coffee maker currently), maybe one of those press thingies.

When you’re a billionaire tech-bro, life’s a beach.

What is the worst living thing on Earth? If you answered “centipedes,” you’re correct! But coming in a close second are humans, of course.

I also gave up coffee about a month ago. Not because of caffeine but because I’m trying to cut out sugar and I can’t stand un-sweetened coffee. It really hasn’t been as bad as I.... one sec...

Waiting for $kay to show us something cheap and plastic.

I’m basing this on the assumption that getting away is the whole point. If you haven’t lost the cops in the first couple of minutes, what are the odds that you will get away at all? The longer the pursuit, the worse your chances.

The answer has to be a crotch rocket, right?

In that case, I recommend the Spare Rib Soup.

See this is why you need to drive an interesting car, people. Your boring-ass vehicle is going to get you mistakenly killed one of these days.

You may already have one and not know it.

It has a certain symmetry to it. Food arrives in a bowl; food leaves in another bowl (eventually).

*pheasant

Yep, I was mistaken. Thanks.

No one under 18 can be given the death penalty. Roper vs. Simmons.

Oh noooo, you definitely shocked me. You should have seen my face...

I am ashamed of myself that I got that reference.

Do try this at home, folks!

Not to be confused with procrastibating, which is proof of the old axiom, “good things come to those who wait.”

Yes.

Oh yeah. But I’m catching on.