But were you allowed to have finger points and herkies? That's really all you need.

Ummmm did you even consider that she has PROOF? Specifically a photo of her next to her ample lipped mother and that everyone knows old people have never and could never fake this sort of thing?

That sounds slightly more wholesome than my cheerleading squad's most popular routine- done to a spliced version of Juvenile's "Back That Azz Up" and ODB's "Got Your Money".

But I'll need to compare our dance moves to be sure. Perhaps yours had a few too many hip thrusts or finger points. Or herkies. The most badass…

I kinda feel like a winner because apparently living in South Philly at some point in your life makes you a badass.

Today I learned that I am a total badass. Thanks Amber Rose!

Yeah, sometimes you get SO bloated and/or constipated during the first trimester and that giant "baby bump" goes away after a really good poop.

Or in my case, all of the trimesters.

Have fun dealing with the fallout on your credit report when the doctor's office and/or your insurance washes their hands of the whole thing and turns your bill over to collections (by which time it has probably accrued a bunch of late charges and shit).

Good times, good times.

Biology/wildlife science nerd who fell into doing bug stuff for a federal agency for a bit, now I'm in a totally different field and only look at insects for fun (omg so much fun). But saying "student of entomology" works better for the joke.

I noticed you posted last week about being a fan of somethingwful (Ari do you…

Yes, that was part of the joke.

There were many layers of nerd humor in there.

Nerdception.

Did he drive a Lincoln?

Trying to figure out whether or not Matthew McConaughey worked at this camp.

omg I need to read this brook asap

This sounds like it could be a Disney movie.

As a student of entomology, I can assure you that it doesn't get any worse than being bitten by a poisonous scorpion.

*nerd jokes*

True story: I had a dream about that bird holding down a hippo comment last night and woke myself up by laughing out loud. I swear to god.

Seconding your "favorite comment of all time" remark because I've never dreamt about/laughed myself awake at a comment before now.

As a 116 year old who was born in 1974, I credit my longevity to being bad at math.

And humor.

There is probably a difference between being photographed talking on a red carpet, being wheeled around in a hand truck, and being photographed with this middle finger pose at a movie premiere.

*smiles and waves at you lovingly*

Isn't being photographed the whole point of getting dressed all fancy and walking/posing on a red carpet? It reads exactly the same as VWolf's examples. You know there are cameras and you are doing things for the cameras.

My point is- always smile and wave while yelling a hearty "GO FUCK YOURSELVES" because it…

I'm about 6 ft tall and blonde and in my early 30s

WHERE MY MODELING CONTRACT AT?

Yeah but flipping the bird from the privacy of your driver's seat or the front pew of a church is different than doing it for a photograph.

Why buy necklaces when you can use their #2 suggestion for a top- arms?

Upper arms, forearms, even hands can do in a pinch to cover them boobies.

This. I had a pair in 1999 of which a friend said (and I quote) "Those are so low it makes me kinda nauseous".

Had to go look in the mirror and yeah, they were a bit gross. Loved that 1" zipper fly though.