I also can't nap but have the opposite problem. My head hits a pillow and I stare at the back of my eyelids for an hour while I wonder about stupid shit (like whether orcas are more like dolphins or whales, I know they are some "c" word that sounds like crustacean... cetatean? Cetacean? Is that a genus or a family?…

*hits the strip club with a fat stack of Kraft Singles*

of fondue?

Because historically mustaches were a fireman thing and deep down all cops desperately wish they were firemen.

I don't know man, are cop 'staches really even a thing anymore or just popular in movies? I'm a chick so I don't spend much time contemplating facial hair, can only think of like one guy in our department…

Don't most gyms ban glass water bottles?

Don't most gyms ban glass water bottles?

Florida DMV loves ass

It's like a scene from every desert horror movie ever.

You're driving alone through a sunny desert in your car, car breaks down in a desolate area, there is no cell service and the nearest gas station is 412 miles away. You hesitantly get out to check the engine and suddenly get the feeling that someone is watching…

The sloshy bed at 1:30 is kind of grossing me out. Every night on that would sound like walking through a field of thick, very wet mud while wearing oversized galoshes.

But let's talk about that striped cat in the first clip. Am I crazy or is that an exceptionally good looking cat? Seriously, look at them stripes.

Don't forget the "asking for it" clothes. Women practically pour themselves into those gowns and caps at graduation. It's obscene.

this is how you do an underwear ad

Marilyn Manson commands attention with the ease of a hummingbird relishing a pastoral bloom.

Speaking of waffles, Marilyn Manson would like it to be known that at least 3 times a day he gives himself and/or his naked girlfriend an Awful Waffle™ and doesn't even care what you think about it.

• lots of police are former military and stick with the look I guess

I should add that I'm not an expert, just a lowly newb that was really interested in this issue and it was one of the reasons I decided to become a pig join law enforcement. I'm not a detective so my personal experience in rape/homicide investigation is limited.

If there are any crime lab Jezzies that could chime in…

I refuse to be bossed around by your screenname, let me tell you more about lawsuits that I googled!

(But seriously gonna concede to you because I'm no expert. My chair doesn't even have arms)

Pretty much. A few years ago, thousands of US law enforcement agencies were surveyed for a study conducted to estimate the number of unsolved criminal cases containing forensic evidence that had not been submitted to crime laboratories for analysis.. They found that forensic evidence was collected in 88 percent of…

Yes, databases are absolutely helpful. Doesn't lead to immediate arrests because obviously knowing that Suspect #312228740 has raped fourteen women doesn't solve the case when there isn't a name or any more info, but it's a step. That's where police work could come in! It will be especially helpful as more states are…

Well goddamnit, where was the sign?? If customers can bring their own liquor and sneak around the corner to get sauced with the baristas there needs to be a sign!

Don't worry- If you're really busy and can't get away for a shot, I'll just pour a little whiskey into your tip jar for you to drink later. You're welcome.

She said something about "the reality was I hadn't spoken to Mr. Cosby" which kind of implied they weren't close enough for her to call him, and that maybe she doesn't really know him all that well on a personal level if she can only list some vague stuff about $$$ and The Cosby Show as reasons he is great. If you're…

Probably back when Gap Grass existed because the mid-90s scent of freshly cut lawn was like a panacea for all of society's ills.