Across America, a vast and repetitive clicking noise rose into the dusty summer air. The nation’s sportswriters had awakened from their slumber. They hauled their stiff carapaces from the soil and immediately set to their only task, written into their genetic code for thousands of years: pound out stories where BOTH…

RIP Bert: He's dead and Draper is wearing his skin.

Could be code for “Heil Hitler” or as he does it “Hale Hitler".

I love how he says their backyard has turned into a bear hangout like that’s not the greatest thing your backyard could become

I love how British everything is: The prim and proper reporter, the wife who’s gone quietly mad and now seems to have two handmaidens in pig form, and the silent, trainer and tracksuit clad husband who clearly has much to say but only brings up the grunting over the telly.

Well, an actual report might identify instances of wrongdoing, for one.

Yes, there is a potential ethical problem with raising horses as professional athletes for a sport which occasionally kills them but if all goes well lets them retire to a life of fucking and rest. But are you really going to say with a straight face that the $0.99/lb roasting chickens at the grocery store aren’t the…

Hear Hear sister! It started when I was the first girl to wear a bra in middle school, and was ruthlessly bullied by a girl whose name I still remember to this day, and her army of skanks. Moving on to being hit on by my high school teacher, another girl starting rumors about me that I’d had breast implants (at 15…

This exact scenario has happened to me my whole life. I have a very distinct memory of wearing a tank top in high school gym and being told never to wear it again. I pointed out a girl in the class wearing the same exact shirt, and was told “it’s different on her”.

It’s not. It’s fucking AWFUL having large breasts and you DO get treated like an asshole by asshole ALL.THE.TIME.

I'm pretty sure I read a gym response in which they claimed she should have been wearing proper athletic attire or whatever. They have no denied that it happened. Unless I missed something...

As a large busted lady, I can tell you from experience: big titties look like big titties, no matter what you cover them up with.

I have just finally gotten to the point in life where I am comfortable wearing tops that aren’t super loose or conservative because of all of the shit I got in middle school and high school for having large breasts in proportion to my frame. Fuck those supervisors for pulling that bullshit. It is that type of behavior…

If you have a robot read Rovell’s tweets it creates an infinite loop where the only sound that comes out is a steady thin metallic screeching

if it wasn’t for Gawker blogs I wouldn’t get my weekly allotment of “hot takes”.

Counter-counterpoint: Yesterday I watched my cat totally destroy a mouse. Good cat, this is why I scoop your shit.

Fuck off, cats are the shit.

Huh. I don't think the Madden Curse has claimed anyone via STD yet, so that's cool.

I don’t hate gay people! I just like using really deragatory words that imply being gay is equivalent to being an outcast that everyone hates! Why would people think those two things are related at all?!?

But it’s remarkable how much some people—Twitter eggs and Facebook uncles who bitch about their freedom of speech being corrupted because other people had the gall to exercise theirs—really want to hang onto their gay jokes.