“If I can’t read it, it didn’t happen.”

Spanos should call Jed York for some professional advice.

The Zohan of Beef!

+ 1000 yard stare

Jay is such a buzzkill.

SkyNet attempts to be human.

He’s hanging out with the wrong crowd and it starts with his new training partner.

That hole won’t make it to eBay. Antonio Cromartie, Jr. already impregnated it.

My sister’s ex used to vape. Didn’t care for him, he was a real FA Cup

Yikes Vivica! She’s sounding like Tommy Hilfiger.

Something involving cold fusion.

Don’t they get wet when he sits down to pee?

Does the carpet match the drapes?

Hollywood Sock Heisman

This is a perfect opportunity for the football team to make boycotts great again.

The Trumpettes are still waiting for an invitation. They’re probably too old though.

Too bad he missed his real calling as a professional bridge burner.

Sounds like the front desk bungled his reservation.

I’d love to see Judge Judy take on Talib.