I require a photo of your german shepherd corgi. That sounds adorable.

I wish I had been so clever! Early in my career, there was this other lady who had a similar job at another non-profit. I saw her all the time at events, and she introduced herself to me every. time. and would always say, “Oh you must be the new Director at [redacted].” I figured she was just bad at names or…

I also have this fear. I actually told my husband (the rational one in the relationship) to make sure I don’t loose myself in this mommy thing. I’m quite fearful that I’ll stop being fun and informed. He said I’m too stubborn to let some baby tell me what to do. He’s probably right.

We were supposed to drive away from the reception in a lovely vintage Challenger like the one pictured below. However, minutes before our grand exit, the valet tasked with moving the car into position jammed the trunk key in the ignition, rendering the car inoperable. Oops! So much for our awesome muscle car exit.

When I read this, I laughed so loudly my husband called up from another floor in our home to make sure I was OK.

I was so paranoid about this, I took fake rings on our honeymoon. They were very cheap, flashy looking rings, but I really, really didn't want to loose my beautiful antique ring in the ocean.

Congratulations on your new baby!

I take full responsibility for being an asshole when I was in my early twenties, and this is a prime example.

I think you're asking about the Oxford Comma. Technically, both ways are correct. However, I'm #TeamOxfordComma, so I would say "kale, strawberry, and mango carrot."

Go cheap and plain, seriously. It doesn't need to be nice-feeling to the touch, since barely anyone is going to touch it. It just needs to look nice in the photos.

This wasn't really a disaster, but it was kind of funny.

I had so much anxiety about my new doctor approving my request for a refill on Xanax that I took my partially full bottle (prescribed by my previous doctor) to the appointment to prove I was taking it responsibly. She was very amused. I think nothing proves my anxiety more than having anxiety that my new doctor…

Thank you! I've seen that movie, I swear, but I miss every reference anyone ever makes about it. It's like I'm Princess Bride blind or something.

I don't really know what this means, so I'm just going to assume the next NBC musical project is Gilbert and Sullivan's H.M.S. Pinafore.

That's really fantastic! I know it was expensive, but it looks like you really got your money's worth. Good choice in artist and design!

I find it acceptable if it's roasted and salted chip-style, but raw kale is gross. Team spinach!

The long term results of Houseplant Parenting are truly remarkable! I just hate all the lifting to move the crib from one side of the house to the other to constantly face the sun. Ugh!

I'm sorry, but those are some weak-ass Christmas decorations. Perhaps next year they can collect some extra cash from those "secret drug deals" and spring a few hundred bucks for a professional installation. #Priorities

I made these rainbow nesting bowls and sorting balls for a 1 year old (because I'm crafty), but you can buy them as well. I second the Melissa and Doug suggestion. You can't go wrong with a developmental/educational item.

I made this scarf a few months ago. It would be pretty as a pillow, too. It was a really easy pattern. If you don't understand any of the stitches or instructions (in any knitting pattern), YouTube is your friend. Seriously. I taught myself how to crochet from nothing using instructional videos.