Typical libtard! You think this is rasistism? Hold my Natty!

When that asshole Chihuahua bites a different asshole dog at the park, best not get involved when those rabid owners finally start screaming at each other.

And that's why I'll gray-pop you every day of the week 😈

She’s doing it to position herself as a moderate that’ll accept any shit as long as there are promises. She also doesn’t give two shits about those promises being upheld.

It’s amazing how proclaimed ‘leaders’ don’t let dumb just do itself, while distancing themselves as much as possible. Especially with zero downside for doing so. 

You the old Icelandic saying: club two seal pups, half priced Gordito Crunches on Thursdays!

Next in line: John Baron

Typical libtard. You clearly haven’t masturbated through the series with a Reagan-post-dementia speech played in the background.

This. Is. Glorious.

I like to tell my bank that the mortgage payment is ‘coming soon.’ 

Gifting people Monopoly is the second most evil gift ever. The first being when you give your enemies’ children a combo set recorder and Frozen song book.

“Directly interfering in the democratic process and trying to sway elections, both of which are illegal, but daddy Putin told me to do, is failing. SAD! Lemme try some nepotism round 6! SA....”

It wasn't quite that glorious. Best part, I don't drink beer. I was just holding it 😂😂 (and it was a small electric ride on). But damn if I didn't have my first Dad Moment.

“The victim did not even realize she had been stabbed until she got home. She was hospitalized Sunday and had surgery for a collapsed lung.”

Remember when Michelle hugged the queen, and after a half second pause of ‘what is this?’ the queen instantly melted to ‘Yes...this is nice. I like this.’ And yet it was considered a minor scandal.

Fox tomorrow: " This picture proves, only the gentlemen on the Far Right (of the picture) aren't Nazis!"

They were just thanking Laura Ingraham's viewers in anticipation of them tuning in for her hot take tomorrow.

Skellytor tomorrow: but if we watch this picture sped up *furiously Photoshops a salute on a kid that put his name out there to show his disgust* clearly you can see he's also a Nazi. Probably the only one in the whole picture, in fact. This is how they identify Nazis in sports as well.

One answer in the book, but I still want to know how many rafts Florida man raft fucker can fuck if raft fucker continued to fuck rafts.

Id never be able to give it back, lmfao. One of my few moments of true happiness in the past 6 months was riding a borrowed mower, beer in hand.