In my experience, when someone has to tell you how smart they are, they usually are not that smart.

This is going to be long, because I have a lot of pent up feelings.

“Would that be a huge controversy?” the former Arkansas governor asked. “Yes.”

Shit on the toilet seat always baffled me. What the fuck is up with that? Bad aim? Ran out of time? Pretensile asshole? Forgot how to sit down?

What? It’s almost as if you don’t realize an erection is the ultimate magic scepter of approval. It’s like a barometer for female worth, but with veins and sometimes a faint hint of camembert. I mean, obviously.

This is why I can’t get on board with any organization that requires me to leave my free will and ability for critical thought at the door, and let some hierarchical power structure do all my think-work for me.

STAY YOUNG. STAY BITTER. STAY YOU.

So you agree with the position that the people who would try to stop yoga in public schools on religious grounds are wrong but you thought, fuck it, let's defend blind faith instead?

Whatever, there was no marriage until the Christian God (THE ONLY GOD) was like, "Let there be light and also marriage. But not for the gays because that's icky." Also that happened 6000 years ago and paleontologists are just a bunch of dirty liars. Fact.

Drawing the liner on way outside her real lip line doesn't account for the shadows cast by the light source and the three-dimensionality of her new lips. And if it was just lip liner, the space between the top of her upper lip and the bottom of her nose would appear smaller than it used to, because her lip liner would…

I also have a chronic illness, and this article enraged me. No, I would not be cool with a partner deciding to cheat on me months after I got ill, me finding out, then me being given an ultimatum that either I go along with the cheating or get dumped. This is just such a sucky corner this woman has backed her husband…

I'm sorry you're not very good at read comprehension

Seriously, on basically any standard they want to apply, another country is doing it better. Often, lots of countries are doing it lots better. We're not exceptional. The US is like the kid that had rich parents and then swears they're successful just because they worked really hard.

Academic vocabulary please! In Science we speak Science!

So... we shouldn't teach history, just nationalist propaganda. We shouldn't teach literature, except maybe some Ayn Rand. We shouldn't teach science unless we act like theology counts as science. And we definitely shouldn't be teaching critical thinking skills. But we must teach our kids math so we can outshine those…

What in the everloving fuck is she talking about?

We are so behind so many countries in math and science. They are not even getting the basic education because they are getting taught that evolution doesn't exist and that the earth is 6,000 years old.

True. It's also amusing because this fundamental reliance on teaching the modern corruption of American exceptionalism at all costs belies this underlying shame about our country's often checkered past. The only real reason you wouldn't want to teach our real history is if you were ashamed of it. Because, really, it's…

You don't get to bitch about students falling behind in math and science while supporting 'teach the controversy' bullshit or out right removal of evolution from the curriculum.

Clearly everyone's just supposed to 'know' and not knowing means you're a filthy common pleb who could only dream of being worthy enough one day to vacuum the red carpet prior to it going back in to storage for the season.