My daughter and I say this to each other frequently, usually from out of nowhere.

I am Jack's utter lack of surprise.

Go through an 18-month (even three-month) dry spell with someone you love very much and want to be the only person with whom you have sex and tell me masturbation is enough. Perhaps an extreme example, but it isn't as simple as fucking oneself to make up for a lack of sex.

I have a male friend who was pooped on mid-coitus. His response was to walk them both to the shower, clean up and then finish together.

Mandatory reporters in the state have been required to report animal abuse for at least the last few years. I really appreciate they've taken the next logical step.

Culinary Rorschach.

This paralyzed me for about 15 seconds. Then came the laughter and tears.

Ai yi yi! No me gusta!

I'm absolutely terrified of snakes, but I'm glad they didn't kill it.

NO, GODDAMNIT, NOT THIS TIME. NO PRIVILEGE CHECKS.

Reading comprehension much? I didn't say that I use those words with people.

Sometimes it isn't the right time for someone to start therapy. I will often let people know that it's ok if they can't or don't want to make time to attend regularly and do whatever work needs to be done (homework, percolating, whatever)*. It doesn't matter to me, I can't force people to attend, and I don't want to…

No, it's mimosas in the morning.

". . . delicious, bacteria ridden death bowl."

That woman was awesome!

Lentil soup lady must have achieved epic levels of squalor.

Pretty much any day that ends in a y is good for hipster slapping. Select an individual or go for the spree. Dealer's choice!

I love this gif so much. And your name.

How many of those men are assaulted because they are men? How many are assaulted for "acting like women?" I understand your point, but men being assaulted isn't the norm. They may not receive help, but I'd wager that many of them don't feel as deeply violated and victimized.

Oh, sweet jebus, it couldn't possibly have been you. When I go to pick up Little GV from after school care (she's 11) the rooms where the pre-teen and teenaged kids spend the most time REEK of BO. It's really gross.