Tried to stay friends.

fuck cover bands, indeed.

The ‘Gene Simmons’ of a local Kiss cover band decided to go solo writing his own material and managed to pen the WORST SONG IN EXISTENCE. I DARE YOU TO LISTEN TO MORE THAN 30s OF THIS:

Damn, fake KISS managed to be even creepier than real KISS. I have a KISS impersonator story too, which is that one time in Vegas my friends and I started talking to a KISS impersonator and it turned out he and I went to the same Utah middle school, and I was all, ‘There but for the grace of God go I.’ (Not out loud,…

Haha, I’ve had the misfortune of seeing a KISS cover band as well; let’s just say it was special.

I think I love you. Also, more of the fish and wildlife guys would say the same thing to you as I was told after barfing over the side of a sailboat in the middle of the Great Barrier Reef on the way to a snorkeling trip: better out than in! (I barfed on the Australian flag as we sailed instead. Thankfully without an…

This is very true.

Yeah, people really seem to like those. I also know several people that swear by the little behind-the-ear patches.

I imagine working in a kid-centric job hardens you to the fluids and filth that is humanity.

I'm literally crying I'm laughing so hard at this! I'm so sorry that happened, but holy moly it's a great story.

I’d feel bad for the turtle too.

They’re so good! I even like them for at home because I can get nauseous from anxiety. If you’re a big dork like me, you can even get them in pink! Oh, and peppermint Tummy Drops if you get nauseous help a lot too. I get both on Amazon.

Have you tried Sea Bands? I get horrible sea sickness too and they helped me last time I was on a boat. Fuck those fish and wildlife guys, they should’ve been nicer.

FWIW, very few people can say they’ve barfed on a protected species.

Alright, I’ve never posted anything on Jez but I can’t resist this one-

It was NY, August 1980, and I was wearing a pale pink "garden" type ensemble that included a split skirt that I bought in a soho boutique. Did I have a wedding wardrobe malfunction? No. Although my grandmother certainly thought so, and made that crystal clear as I approached the altar. "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph," she…

"My hamster was scared."

Article on the front page of the local newspaper depicting my then boyfriend (who had told me he needed some space and was going to hike the Appalachian Trail by himself) with another girl with the headline, "Local Couple Leave To Hike The Appalachian Trail Together." Not sure what he thought was going to happen with…

PALEOSHARTS.

The recipe in question: