$60/day for an automatic 240D. That’s going to be an expensive first left turn as you wait until there’s nothing coming for five miles in either direction.

“Allemon felt his vehicle was disrespected when the victim installed eBay coilovers and a “Shocker” decal on his rear window inset with a Japanese Rising Sun design,” the release says.

Let’s see what we can gather from that quote, using our reading.

If we are to use a metric in which one vote equals one vote (points in this case) in this metaphor, then Rosberg won the popular vote. I suppose I’m imagining an Constitution-bound FIA that would met a month after the Portuguese GP in 1984 and voted in favor of Prost winning the championship over Lauda. So, much…

Once it becomes an essay about the FIA, Federalist Papers, and the US Constitution, and TIME’s Person of the Year, it’s not much of a joke.

Hamilton won the Electoral College though.

I think the only driverless future ahead of us is also human-less. You know, real progress.

I thought it was the coolest thing ever when I was 10! Truthfully, there was a mint fully-optioned first-gen Turbo near me a few months ago while I was looking for another car it was a little tempting to go look at it.

I’m of the ilk. It’s a shame since it was obtained legitimately, I just haven’t played in a long long time.

Can you still transfer your PS3 GTA Online character to the PS4 version? I’ve got many, many millions to blow.

I’m not going to generate a lot of anything with 60hp.

Nice to know the new Mustang has the same drag coefficient as my 1972 Saab.

I’m curious, is it now completely forbidden to share Oppo stories on the Jalopnik main page?

I hope my imagination is able to flourish and extend a little bit further than “most generic hot rod of my generation” when I’m a grandfather. I already have the angry part down so I’m well ahead of these mediocre bastards.

Maybe some kind of coordinated trolling effort? I dunno. (Also, yay SAABs!)

It’s hard to spot the difference between those and the Lancia Beta.

No, you’re right. The Alfasud is an economy car made in a different factory with a boxer four cylinder. The GTV 2000 is the car in the picture, decidedly NOT a supercar.