“Oh sure, he can call them savages, but when I do it...”

I remember back in 2002 when Mike Piazza had to tell us all he was a savage in the box.

It’s weird how Caillou grew up to become Brett Gardner.

“Fuck no I’m not paying you for this. a) That was like 20 years ago and b) I said Big POPPA.”

Horford may not get 30 million a year but you can bank on his sister at some point calling a superior player’s wife or girlfriend a whore on twitter

I think it’s totally understandable that he doesn’t want a pic like that to be the centaur of attention

You motherfucker, take your star and die!

Goddamn, man. This being Deadspin, I want to make a joke...but I just can’t; nothing about child abuse is humerus.

If Fireman Ed showed up anywhere in this story, I’d assume it’d be in the indictment. 

Next season, you’ll be able to see the Patriots’ MHK patches from space.

God, I had the biggest crush on Liz Phair. Hell, I still do.

God dammit man, I only have so may spit-takes. Fuck you.

Cocain't blame him for trying.

Jim Irsay’s Opanan on this matter is worthless. The Subutex of the tweets is that he doesn’t want the Colts Morphine into a mindset that they can’t be the Team that’s Tapentadol of the league.

Not sure what your trying to quallude to...

hashtag SchrodingersGoat

Anyone who Oxycondones this bullshit is Dilaudid

i, for one, will never play in the NHL as long as they keep goons like Wilson around

He looks like Dennis Quaid wearing an Angela Lansbury mask.

I’m not really interested in being lectured about fiscal responsibility by the guy who gave massive contracts to both Brock Osweiler and Case Keenum.