Now THIS is a hockey story about violence that we can ALL get behind!

just go down to your local bank and show them your white privilge card. you’ll instantly be granted a 60k/year salary

Who is out here eatin just 1 strip of bacon? I really wanna know

Holiday Inn Express pancake machine, although it’s usually out of order.

Add bacon to the waffle batter

I’m not going to let you site calories as the concern if you’re talking about bacon as your preference. You can say carbs, if you’re one of those Amstel light motherfuckers, but I won’t accept calories.
Besides, you counteract the sleepiness of the carbs by drinking heinous and unhealthy amounts of coffee. Then you…

John Lennon was a neglectful father, a spousal abuser, a reductive political thinker, and all around douchebag... but yeah, I agree with you there.

“NO. YOU CANNOT!!!!”
- Tim Tebow

“Whoa whoa! You can plan parenthood?”

The only way I can enjoy “Girls”, which I truly love, is by pretending Lena Dunham isn’t a real person and avoiding all of the post-show interviews that they air immediately following each episode. The show is great, but it’s sullied whenever Dunham rants and raves about how Hannah is supposed to be relatable... She…

I read all of these tweets with the voice of the Girl You Wish You Hadn’t Talked to at the Party, from SNL. That made them more tolerable.

This article could have been comprised solely of Lena Dunham tweets and it would have been completely appropriate. Something sad about complaining unironically and then acting like no one got the joke when people don’t agree. Also, she molested her sister, people don’t forget.

Force Awakens was fine. It really was. John Boyega ruled, Daisy Ridley ruled, Oscar Isaac wasn’t in it enough but he was good in the parts he was in, Kylo Ren was weird and intimidating, seeing Han and Chewy and Leia again ruled, it had good lightsaber shit and good X-wing shit and good Millennium Falcon shit and it…

Better than The Force Awakens, for sure. In the abstract, as a standalone movie, probably better than Jedi, too, but I dunno, I’ll have to watch it another dozen times before I can issue a definitive ruling on it.

More like Deerambe amirite?!

So this is where the buck stops.

I know this is a wild idea to throw around on the internet, but maybe he should just have a civil conversation with the bride and propose the “neatly trimmed” option. Then if she really sticks to her crazy guns you can make the decision based off that, but I think that just defying her wishes without a discussion is a…

I am sad for you. Good fried chicken is heavenly. It’s just as good when it’s cold the next day out of the fridge. Bad/mediocre fried chicken is horrid.

Jimmy John’s isn’t the best but you lost me when you brought up Subway. That said both fall woefully short to Publix subs.