I was looking at buying a new stove the other day, and it’s already come full circle. It was described as having “air fryer function.” Like, an air fryer is just a tabletop convection oven, but i guess having the word “fryer” in a supposedly “healthier” context is the branding win eluded “convection oven” for all…

I’ve really experimented with canned clam sauce over the years. I melt some butter, some cream, throw in some capers, maybe some parm, garlic, pepper. Can’t imagine doing all that AND having to make fresh clams.

Snow’s canned clams have been a staple for me for at least 15 years. I always have at least one can in the cupboard. Whenever I don’t have a ready idea for a meal... clam sauce! 

I ate lunch at the Apple campus a few times in Cupertino, and I don’t know if their cafeteria designed the box or what, but I was actually impressed with the reimagined pizza box. I know it’s a little on the nose to say “reimagined Apple Pizza Box” but it was at least better than the traditional pizza box. First off,…

It’s possible the deli person who told me this was mistaken, or maybe I got it confused with braunschweiger, which I believe does contain raw pork.

I’ve been told liverwurst is a pain because it’s technically considered a raw meat, so they have to use a separate slicer or clean the slicer immediately after slicing it.

With prosciutto or bresaola or speck, I just enjoy snacking on it by itself, so I always ask for it to be cut a little thick. And tell the deli worked that I don’t need it laid out all fancy-like. Just gimme the meat, lemme get out of there without wasting anyone else’s time.

It’s barely pizza, but I always enjoyed buying a Totino’s pizza and putting a slice of american cheese on it in the last few minutes it was in the oven. Just fantastic.

Years ago, my work colleagues and I decided to try to eat healthier, so we thought we’d try going vegan for a week. I immediately dubbed it “Operation: Bad Mood,” since i knew it would make us all miserable. And it was, in fact, awful. but one thing I did come away with was a grudging respect for vegans. It’s pretty…

I don’t clean mine as much as I should, but i actually don’t feel like it needs to be cleaned THAT often. Sometimes if I’m cooking something that drops a considerable amount of grease/oil, I’ll just pour that into the garbage to buy me a little more time between cleanings.

Over 10 years of marriage as well, approve of all these, with the addition of:

I just never got the “Doritos” taste from them at all. If I hadn’t known they were supposed to be Dorito flavored, I never would’ve guessed. Definitely a dissapointment.

Oh, he sure as shit doesn’t care about anybody in any of those countries. But he CERTAINLY loves expressing fake-outrage to “expose” the “hypocrisy” of the “far left.”

Just off the top of my head...

20 years ago a friend introduced me to her favorite dip: Block of Velveeta, can of Hormel chili (no beans), one onion diced. Bake it. Done. It’s perfection, but I only allow myself to have it once a year, on Super Bowl Sunday.

Yeah, the only time i ever eat at McDonald’s is on road trips. My wife likes to scour Yelp for local eateries near whatever interstate gas station we pull up at, and once in a blue moon we find a really good taco truck or something, but for the most part its a mine field of sub-par to downright terrible unknowns. I’m…

Same with the Chili Cheese burrito. The world got 2% sadder when that was removed from the menu.

I never ate dry Nestle Quick, but i did eat a TON of Lipton ice tea powder. Sometimes just like a Fun Dip style snack, sometimes I’d put it in a mug with a splash of water and make a thick ice tea sludge that I’d eat slowly with a spoon. 

What they SHOULD have done is get an entirely green bottle, then digitally inserted an accurately-color sriracha bottle into the scene.

I do most of my out-of-home drinking in music venues these days (or at least I did), and this is something I am definitely going to do, because even without a mask I had to scream into the bartenders’ ears.