Oh look! It’s the Dolphins!

Kind of looks like Elvis, doesn’t it?

the Patriots are trying to control the weather to gain an unfair advantage

All jets should steer clear of this cloud.

If you want to get real spy-like with it you can dress as a caterer (black pants, black t-shirt). Put a suit jacket and dress shirt into a disposable aluminum serving tray covered with foil. Carry that to the service entrance and say “They ran out of (whatever the fuck)“. Once inside go to a bathroom or closet or some…

Thanks, Buzz Killington.

“Act like you belong. Exude confidence”. Holy shit, revolutionary!

I once snuck into a concert where each ticket cost $3,000. I also made it past 6 security check points. Want me to rewrite this article for you?

Your daily dose of inauthentic, overgeneralized “advice,” brought to you, as always, by Leslie Horn and Adequate Man.

I could have learned these pro-tips from Night at the Roxbury

Those slimy corporatist scumballs at BIG SPORTS EVENT always need to have their damn logo plastered over everything.

I don’t know, Chris. I have both DraftKings AND ISIS at the top of my list of “Organizations I’d Like to See Rocketed into the Sun”

You need to be 3/3.

I agree on the sideshow potentially being part of the reason he’s out of the league. I hated his guts at Florida and couldn’t stand Tebowmania in Denver, but I kinda miss the guy now. I’d take him as a sideshow over deflategate or Greg Hardy or whatever any day of the week. I’d be happy to see the Texans replace…

This might be the most horrifying thing I have ever heard.

I use the “I’ll time you trick” on my daughters all the time. Children are such adorable, glorious little morons.

“Absolute bust” is a little harsh regarding Tebow. Not sure how going 9-7 on a team that was 4-16 before is awful, and then never being allowed to start again after going 1-1 in the playoffs in your 15th & 16th starts? Not a bust. Hell, he even looked good throwing the ball in preseason this year, and watching…

Looks like she elected to receive in the second half.

“Like everything associated with a Sean Taylor jersey, this is a display of really, really bad judgment. Really, really bad judgment.”

I can’t fault him. That’s probably the only way I’d enjoy being at a Skins game, too.