I'm the best linebacker in the NFL, or my name ain't Denby.

So, you ask that people are DTC - down to comply.

Herman Cain says this is a standard workplace environment.

If somehow Matt Millen ends up in attendance, the chances of that ship sinking are at least 25%.

Haven't thought of that one, emailing Deadspin tips to ask them for tips.

Sure, but everyone knows Green Bay has been the best team so far. So what's factual about the "aura of awesomeness" that's supposedly attributed to the Patriots? If someone has a problem with Joe Buck thinking the Patriots are invincible, then call the column "Is It Time For Joe Buck And Other Media Blowhards To Lose…

Now PSU will be sending out alerts if Sandusky returns to campus.

Nice signature Ashton, but it's supposed to go at the end of what you're writing. #noclass

Aye, I remembers the rock of Gibraltar moving quicker than this scoundrel.

This is anti-Patriots trolling at a slightly higher reading level.

So the devil's name is Leslie Wilson? Because that sounds like a quote from Satan.

Amen?

Hang around at the airport enough, and you'll probably see John Lackey being a prick towards airport security.

What part of "Red Bull: New Year No Limits" did Connie not understand?

I don't know what you get out of defending Rich Kotite's honor, ESPN comment moderators, but I will be back.

Wait, are you a Lions fan?

The ocean off the coast of San Diego? Potential "Big East" territory right there.

+1

I took that to mean he wishes Andy Reid was his coach again.

Luke 9:48 isn't exactly a strategy for winning in the NFL.