The horse didn't have to spend any more time in Philadelphia, so the vet did the horse a favor.

In British Columbia, drugs rehabilitate you.

I have great affection for Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire for different reasons: one hit many home runs on steroids, and the other hit even more home runs, on more steroids.

Who's going to get picked last next time there's a pickup game at the World Cup? These guys.

@Jews For Purple Jesus: There was a hell of a parade after the Rodney King verdict, also.

Why buy a car from Ed O'Bannon when Jim Herrick will give you a car for free?

To say he has an act would be missing the point - which is, the Swami is his alias for when he goes into inner cities and suffocates homeless people.

@Scoops: Excuse me sir, is your website on fire?

Does "Jimmy was doomed from day one!..." mean Vinny's acknowledging his failures as a father?

Even Mets fans hate the Mets.

Maybe the Joe Buck Live attendance list will be published, so that sociology departments can use it for research.

I hope the old guy who was doing the gator chomp behind the ABC broadcasters at Game 3 of the Finals gets arrested.

He can't run, can't throw and can't field, but the sumbitch can navigate a refugee boat.

Without their role model, the Little Leaguers will need to find another way into the meth-dealing industry.

Just wait until Jason Whitlock tries to crash a Mitt Romney fundraiser.

He's obviously learned his lesson and doesn't need to be tested after he comes back.

AJ Burnett got hammered like Shane McGowan.

He's going to rename Carson Palmer's kids "Ocho" and "Cinco"

Did any of them use Joe Morgan as one of their professional references?

This opens the door for CBS to create a player profile for the Ghost of David Ortiz.