It’s funny how Wheat Chex is awful to eat as cereal but the absolute best of the three when transmogrified into Chex Mix. It’s tight wheat weave allows it to absorb all the butter and assorted spices and hold them inside, unlike the Corn and Rice Chex, which only get a surface glazing that, while tasty, doesn’t carry…

Yeah, no shit. Now we’re all paying for him being blackballed from the "Greatest Grifter's Club in America." 

Stabbed in the Butt cereal is just knockoff Colon Blow.

This is worked for Belichick, after all. He went 5-11 his first year in Foxboro, and that was after amassing a losing record in five years over in Cleveland. But he kept on being a stone cold prick, won a Super Bowl the following year, became the greatest coach in history, and now his whole routine is so patented that…

With few exceptions, every Mahomes game should be 5 Throwgasms.

Did he just say “making fuck”?

To answer one of the often asked questions about New Orleans tourist spots - the city is the home of the WWII museum because Higgins Boats (used to put troops on the beaches during DDay) were built in New Orleans. Another fun fact - all workers that built the boats (black/white, male/female) were paid the same wages…

Did you not just read Drew’s whole deal about how he’s constantly been blitzed out of his mind on Primo Chronic lately?

Anyone who lives in Las Vegas and judges a tourist should be punched in the face. Tourists are the only reason that city exists.

Without the drinking, Drew is basically Jon Stewart’s character from half-baked now.

“You Must Be Sure You Wanna Taste It” may sound like the worst possible slogan for something you want people to drink, until you imagine some giant Slavic dude in a track suit declaring “I am for sure to taste you” before opening it with his teeth.

Yes, but in the fine tradition of Baltimore quarterbacks, let's spend the next decade arguing about whether or not Lamar Jackson is elite.

My first trip to New Orleans was for a medical equipment conference in 2011. The conference was a dud but I did get one night out on Bourbon Street. After a couple hours of consuming alcoholic beverages served in novelty plastic containers, I was sufficiently content and incredibly hungry. I figured I was in one of…

your class

Jets at Patriots: The Patriots are going 16-0. It’s so clear already. Everything has been leading up this.

Thanks Mrs. Cousins.

— only you never wanted any Farewell Tour.

“Jameis Winston: a sloppy turnover machine with an ongoing addiction to grabbing things that do not belong to him.”

Who could have predicted that “that” was...mediocrity?