On his driver’s license I believe it’s R. Maty.

I could definitely be talked into that one, plus the idea that he was actually suspended during his first retirement.

I’d say “MJ got banned for gambling”, but I don’t know if that even still qualifies as a conspiracy theory.

It is very hard to make a good living doing something that anybody can do. Ironically, that is both drive an uber, and act.

I can’t believe George Lucas drives a motherfucking Jeep.

#blackcoffeematters

How did Washington’s lawyers gain access to my browser history?

probably because of that big fuckin black shape in front of his face

“I disagree.”
—Tiger Woods
/Tees up ball, fires it at Jordan Spieth’s nuts

Why don’t we compromise? I suggest “King Muscle Hamster the Inconsistent.”

Goddammit, that's the joke.

I want to share this on Facebook and unfriend everyone that says anything bad about it. The Bautista Bat Flip is way better than any political litmus test. If you hate this, I probably hate you.

It’s bleak in Cleveland, folks. So, so bleak.

“it’s totally screwed on wrong.”

So we can call this one Benghazi, right!?

Oh... we can’t?

First, thanks for the response.

It’s this “Integrity Of The Game Certification” upon which the NFL has hinged its four-game ban on the Patriots quarterback

“I’m so sick of this fu——- bu——— you c—-.”

“And then the guy said, “It’s a soccer ball, not a kickball,” and the other guy jumped over a table to hit him and all hell broke loose.

The Layne Stayley Man-In-The-Box sold separately.