It’s not that I didn’t find the Crank movies fun, it’s just that I don’t think one of the directors for those films is a good fit for Hellboy. I would love to proven wrong, but I won’t hold my breath.

Hey, true! That said, though, even Steven Seagal had a couple movies like Under Siege. Doesn’t change the fact that any movie with his mug on the cover is almost guaranteed to be a piece of crap. It’s just whether it will be a fun piece of crap or not. I’m to the point of viewing Gerard Butler in the exact same way.

I mean, hell, surely even just letting him have an animated special to wrap up his story wouldn’t too big of an ask, right?

Considering the director, I am really worried that it will be someone like Gerard Butler, or Jason Statham.

I also want to believe this will feel closer to the comic, but when I see who the director is? It’s pretty hard for me to believe that this won’t feel even more like an Xtreme Sportz version of the property than the last one did (or that it’ll even be a “good” version of that brand of storytelling).

It’s the deadpan quality. Hellboy has to have a sense of deadpan reaction to him, because it conveys that even Hellboy thinks this shit is weird. That’s a loveable trait.

You know, thinking about it, why the hell don’t they just let Del Toro do an animated Hellboy III? That solves the “Ron Perlman’s age/Selma Blair’s health” problem, and Del Toro’s already shown with Pinocchio that his authoritative vision works just as well in animated form. Hell, those two animated movies with…

(Raises hand)
Me. I want more Hellboy. My favorite comic series of all time.

I agree that anything other than a Hellboy III just feels like a waste of time. But I’m even more frustrated that they’ve tapped one-half of the duo behind fucking Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance to do this shit. Ugh.

(As an ardent Hellboy fan, my reaction to this news went like thus):

Man, now I really wish this was something we were getting.

“In for a penny, in for a pound,” amiright? After all...

I still think Spiral is the best guess I’ve seen proposed (then again, I may just be thinking that because I would LOVE the plot to be Deadpool and Wolverine in Mojoworld).

Huh. It’s interesting that you’re enjoying the disconnectedness more.

...who inexplicably has a legitimately cool origin story (that is squandered because her creator thinks sexy poses are more important than actual characterization)?

Hey! “Dingus”! My son loves that word (and no, not any of my pets; my actual flesh-and-blood son).

Of course they don’t... it’s free advertising!

Yay! That one class I took where we talked about copyright law for one whole class period paid off!

I mean... basically. Ooph, I am still annoyed that it took 13 INSTALMENTS before Kang popped back up after that bombshell of a season finale in Loki. It’s ridiculous!

Huh. This seems like a pretty clear-cut case of parody, so was there really any danger of a lawsuit?