Agreed, I'd take DC over NYC any day.

One of my great joys in life is shouting "CHICKENFUCKER" at my friends.

I'm not a big quoter in general, but the one I always come back to is "That little guy? I wouldn't worry about that little guy." My first presentation at work, I was showing some data and someone asked about an outlier. I pretty much had to physically restrain myself.

this is fucked up. I totally get writing sons of anarchy fanfic or scandal fanfic because you're writing about the characters, but fiction about real people is so gross and weird. If you have weird sexual thoughts about zayn, think them masturbate then be done.

I think we should all chip in on this, and all the contributors get invited to the wedding. I'll bring the syrup.

Same.

You chose the best picture of Patrick Stewart ever. Excuse me while I change my panties.

*slowly shoves wristlet into depths of closet*

I really like this collection. But I love color and prints (despite living in NY where gray is considered a bright color). I think these clothes look bright and fun and a bit whimsical.

It's in my Top 3 Favorite things about myself.

Makeup stresses me out because it's expensive and confusing and I never learned how to put it on right! I always make my friends put on eye makeup for me when I want my eyes to look fancy and then they're like "Hold STILL, god damn it, you are the worst person to put makeup on" and I'm like "Sorry my eyes react…

one of my favorite Life Moments was coming home at two o'clock in the afternoon on St. Patrick's Day to find a completely shit-faced girl slumped into the alcove of my apartment building. Her makeup was ... Fleeing the scene.

but what if you spent a lot of time this week binge watching Bridezillas which is basically just drunk girlfriends yelling at their partners pre-wedding?!

I just like beds. I like furniture, clean clothing, a picture on the wall, sheets that are washed weekly, a toilet that isn't filthy, knowing how to cook a meal that isn't mac and cheese, etc. It's not so much that I have a weird anti-mattress on the floor phobia it's just that the kind of people that don't bother to…

I was surprised how far not being a dick got me. Like, I would have dates where I was super awkward and there was no chemistry, and the woman would still tell me it was one of the best dates she had had because I wasn't a dick.

I find something really repugnent in making people download some garbage app just to get ten seconds of a song.

I didn't find Tucker Carlson's email particularly polite or cheerful. I didn't like his *tone* either. I mean this in the spirit of helpful correction. He should thank me.

With Ana chained to him.

Most of the musicians I love are dead.