More like, how the hell did it take so long for cops to arrive?!

The airbag sensors are in the bumper, why would they go off?

Just go to your local duchebag forum and look for some asshat talking about his sick whip and match those ugly ass rims. Fucking scab.

Was he just doing Eat Pray Love or something? Maybe I’m thinking of the wrong movie.

You’ve never slipped your fingers in a coin purse looking for pennies?

I’ve only heard it used for vagina, but urban dictionary has both definitions.

Like a zoo?

Woah woah woah, could be Pleasant hill.

Yeah, people are racist as fuck here. But I’d say more tweakers than hippies.

We’re a special kind of... special.

Doesn’t one G stand for “Good” not mediocre?

There are a three, but two are damn near touching walnut creek and clayton.

Go to Mountain Grounds on Alhambra ave instead.

There is a disturbing lack of peet’s. I think we have 4-5 in the whole area, and about 50 Starbucks.

I hate it when we make the news.

$9 worth of leather, 30c worth of slave labor, $990.70 worth of designer label tax.

$1000 backpack?!

Weird how “coin purse” is a nickname for vagina.

What about my bitch-tits?

You think this has been that well thought trough? HA!

Wow, how about a spoiler alert?! I’m only up to season 3 of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Hrm, ok I don’t know anything about the euro bumpers. My diving boards don’t bother my that much.