Piscotty, meet balls.

If you can’t navigate your way through adult-length sentences then maybe you should get your soccer highlights somewhere else.

How the hell do they enforce that shitty law?

Gödel, Escher, Harbaugh: An Eternal Golden Buzzcut

Technically, I think she’s his sorbitol mama.

I would have to guess that professional wrestling is somewhere in the top 10 as well.

I starred this because I agree with it and because it might make a libertarian have a stroke.

Probably “Whatsinthebox.”

Something something retractable roof.

You’re right, Commander Data, those two messages are both factually accurate and not mutually exclusive.

The shroud of evidence is 15% off with any purchase of a rope of truth.

Nope. If you have a conversation in public you do so with the knowledge that people around you can hear it.

Maybe don’t lump both of those messages into the same e-mail?

He’s at like 95% on the Shkreli Index of Punchable Faces.

I’m not disputing your claim nor am I interested in rehashing the issue, but making general statements about what “the media” believes or supports is a page straight out of the Trump playbook.

The problem is that any player(s) good enough to make up that difference are eventually going to end up getting sold to the teams that Everton is looking up at right now.

And what would bring Everton fans more joy from week to week than seeing the hometown-boy-done-good Wayne Rooney back scoring wonderful goals and pinging majestic passes at the place where it all started

These books sound like they were written by a slightly above average 8th grader in a moderately progressive Catholic school.

The driver was 60, not 90.

To completely disregard the growing scientific research on Paleo-like diets and its implications on health a weight loss can only be due to cowardice, fear, and guilt.