I said I don’t live in your head! I said you might want to introspect on why you said it. I just feel like if some asshole shoved shit in my pants and then the video of it was posted on a fairly well-trafficked website, which would be annoying in and of itself, I might have the negative experience exacerbated if…

I told him it was a gift!

Once when my dad was like 8-10 years old in brooklyn a grown man handed him a paper bag. When he opened it-a live sewer rat jumped out.

Oooh...

I’m so proud of the man he grew up to be.

I love Christian. He annoyed me a li’l bit on his PR season with the nonstop catchphrases, but his talent was always undeniable and he’s grown up to be such an admirable young man :)

🙌

I mean, it's not like there's not ENOUGH hate crime. Being in Britain, the aftermath of Brexit has brought it all to the surface, and it's all so desperately sad. So fuck this guy if he is trying to scrape together an iota of publicity with a staged attack.

50 LGBT people were massacred less than a month ago and this motherfucker decides to stage a hate crime for internet fame? I’m just appalled.

This is insulting to her journalistic integrity and how much risk she took, but not surprising. I have noticed that a lot of books authored by women are marketed to fail. A few years ago, I decided to make an effort to read more female authors (and have read some amazing books as a result), but I can't get past the…

I only recently found out that she’s a billionaire heiress. She could have spent her life squandering daddy’s money and abusing his connections, but instead she forged her own career as one of the funniest people in the world. AND she seems like a total mench. I love and respect her so much it’s bordering on creepy

Bleedin’ eejits, say my Irish relatives.

One of these days our eyes will meet...

That’s why I pack all kinds of random shit under there, I tell everyone that it’s because I’m a slob, but really it’s so nobody can fit in there.

Why isn’t the punishment for breaking restraining orders so much more severe? This guy broke the fucking restraining order three times before this happened!

As the wonderful black women who raised me would say: They stupid.

I would respectfully suggest that understanding that nothing posted online is ever private is a more vital life skill than knowing how to correctly spell Ta-Nehisi Coates.

I think a basic rule of thumb for every job is that you can blow off as much steam as you want, but never put it in writing.

Whatever, teachers aren’t saints and everyone has to blow off steam about their work. It’s also a well known fact that teenagers are awful (I can say that, having once been an awful teen myself). Maybe work on your firewalls or something.

You know, if it were just teachers making sarcastic, exasperated remarks and blowing off steam, I would think nothing of it. But to refer to children as fucking idiots and hope they fail—while being part of the group that can actually make that happen—goes too far. I had a teacher who had it out for in 7th grade and…