What a minute. He is actively protresting America, and American policies (abortion), why doesn’t someone ask him why he doesn’t go back to Italy and fix it first?

I’m not a professional journalist, but it seems like a pretty obvious question.

When you title them as ‘anti-abortion,’ you are allowing them to dictate the terms of nomenclature. They are not anti-abortion; they are anti-choice. Their motivation has nothing to do with a surgical procedure (we know this since so many have been outed as allowing/forcing their significant others to terminate an…

When I was seven or eight, my dad told me cows that live in the mountains had longer legs on one side of their body so they were able to stand on the slopes. Regular cows would fall over in the mountains. I totally believed this. The next school year we studied adaptive behaviors in animals like those fish in…

Well I guess we can blame this one on the 80s, and I imagine it is familiar to many... but we grew up always knowing Uncle Larry’s roommate would be at every major family function.

Oooh I thought of another one. We convinced my daughter that teleportation totally exists, but it was illegal due to the Great Teleporter Riots of the early 90's (she was born in ‘97). She wasn’t sure whether to believe us, but I let my dad in on the joke and one day Grampa started talking about the Teleporter Riots…

My mother told me that when someone sneezes the appropriate response is “achooie-woowie-woots!” Not bless you. Achooie-woowie-woots. I thought it was bless you in another language, like “gesundheit.” It wasn’t until I was an adult teaching middle school that anyone questioned “achooie-woowie-woots.” One of my 8th…

In middle school, my younger sister was in a rebellion phase and told my very liberal parents she was going to become a republican. Without missing a beat, my mom looked her in the eyes and told her that she couldn’t because they had put Democrat on her birth certificate. All the rest of us agreed that it was true, so…

I am so stressed out that I don’t remember what not being stressed even feels like, and I drink way too much...and yet, here I am, not raping anyone.  Although I did eat my husband’s Ben and Jerrys after he went to sleep, which is probably the same thing since women are all property, right?

Plus, the use of the word “temptation” in the first place is implying that she somehow was alluring this poor upstanding boy into doing something oh-so-naughty, that she participated in her own rape.

argued that his client fell victim to temptation

Part of me wants Cannibal Witch to write a post 5 times a week, every week, but the wiser part of me knows that would detract from the feeling of joy I get every time I see a C.W. post appear.  

The words I’m hot feel foreign on my tongue!

Cannibal Witch, breaking that glass ceiling for all of us.

Yes of course. This is just spotballing trying to make sense of that idiot’s thought processes.

What a compliment! 

I guess this is an area where we’re making strides for true equality: If you have been sexually assaulted, you will not be believed, regardless of your gender.

She’s wrong about the biscuits though.... they’re freakin delicious.

This must be fake footage, otherwise Falwell, Graham and all the other evangelicals wouldn’t be looking to Trump as a modern-day saint.

- needs more lizzo
- will see, will probably love immeasurably
- surprised betty cooper isn’t the one teaching, she obvi knows the business v well
- finally i understand the p of cardi b’s music, it is for this soundtrack exactly. but it also better have some lizzo.