Not to be confused with Law & Order SUV, in which officers ticket vehicles that take up more than one parking space.

I’m not a Proctologist, but I know a fuckin asshole when I see one.

That’s a bit extreme but I’ll be okay with a law that bans Vegans from condescendingly telling me why they think they’re better than me.

Extended bouts of verbal diarrhea can’t be healthy either.

I would also submit that Pinkham was the hero we deserve.

Yep, she dodged a bullet not marrying this profile in courage.

If they made it possible to scrub anyone who posts about keeping refugees out of the US I’d pay money for that. I mean, not much money, but still.

My dad got this for my mom for their anniversary. That’s right, my dad got my mom a toilet for their anniversary and they are still married.

The desire to have the cleanest butt possible is perhaps the most pure Christmas gift one could ask for in my opinon.

I am not a fancy bitch, but I’ve been BEGGING my husband to install a sprayer thing by the toilet. They have them everywhere in Thailand, and i fell in love with them. They’re not even expensive - you can use the cheapest kitchen sprayer they sell!

What every fancy bitch needs? A bidet. But it’s not always easy to just plow some room in your bathroom to put one next to your toilet. So next best thing is this bidet seat that replaces your toilet seat. You can set it to heat so in those cold winter nights when you need a midnight tinkle, you can enjoy the warmth…

And here was silly old me thinking that the Constitution gave supreme authority to the federal government over matters of immigration. Not a word in there about state's having fuck all to do with enforcement of immigration or naturalization policies. So much for conservative penchants for strict originalist…

John Waters needs to put this guy in his next movie.

Nah, he’s wearing a bro-ler.

Anti-Abortion Activists Climb Into Trash, Realize They’re Finally Home

Why can’t people just tell the truth/take the consequences? I missed a flight check-in cutoff by like a minute, didn’t say shit because it was my fault, and went to re-book at the service desk. The poor lady at the desk was dealing with a bunch of people who had bought a flight to Kingston, Ontario when they wanted…

Lord knows it would be the first time.

I mean, Morrissey is a whiny little ass, BUT, Ed Sheeran and Sam Smith are insufferable. So he has a point... this time.

I love how the pizza bedding is dsiplayed in a spotless, modern-furnishings bedroom. Because I think the Venn diagram of “people who buy this bedding” and “people who have that furniture” is two circles about 500 light-years apart.