She is, but her mother and father divorced when she was pretty young.

They treat the professors well - that's why they're all still here. (Honestly, 3% in light of all the shit that's going on here? It's a victory.)

I am not a professor. I am an adjunct. It's a whole different thing. They don't have to treat me well because I'm a replaceable part.

I THINK IT MIGHT BE LASSIE.

NED STARK IS NOT SIXTEEN.

You got me. It was me.

That's nothing. There was a faculty meeting at my school, not horribly long ago, when they announced their plans to cut the full-time faculty salaries by 3% and followed that announcement with a request for voluntary donations to the university.

The full-timers were indignant. As an adjunct, I silently welcomed them…

Foods that should not exist, Fluter edition: FLATWORM FUCKING TOFU

I should've finished reading the comments before responding to you.

In other news, saw that, choked a little laughing, scared both of the pets. Go you.

Can this juice be bought in gallon jugs? I need it for ... reasons.

Who are these people that change every time they leave a yoga class? I do yoga. I want vegetables. I go to the grocery store. Sometimes I go to two because one has better meat and the other has better produce. If it's a fancy night, I may swing by a Redbox for a rental.

The whole time, still in my sweaty, smelly yoga…

They're asking for you on last night's article about the lady who burned down a yoga studio. Some of the jokes are kind of funny.

Who work at the local university. I left it out, but these dudes are not students. Not even close.

The one I've spoken to occasionally said, and I quote, "The bending is just so sexual."

A swath of gentlemen at the local university have discovered the local yoga studio, and believe it to be a great place for prowling.

I intend to disabuse them of this notion by falling out of a handstand and breaking one of their necks.

Ugh, yes - replace gym with yoga studio.

The tag for this?

Simply starring this does not convey the enthusiasm I feel. This is mesmerizing.

I can't with either of them. It was a very difficult Would You Rather, for me.

Not finding out how the rest of the Jez commentariat handles these conflicting interests will be one of my biggest life regrets.

My dad is a big fan of the saying, "Close only counts in hand grenades and horse shoes." Do you think Paltrow knows that one?

I was reading through these, getting ready to be like, "Ray J: such a keeper." Then I saw the thing about Jude Law.

Now I'm bummed I'm too late to Dirt Bag to get a really good round of Would 'Ya Rather going. IF YOU ARE READING THIS. WOULD YOU RATHER J OR LAW? (Note: NOT J-LAW.)

I vote Ray, but only mostly so I could…