They played the opening bars of it as they headed to commercial after the Mack pick-6 and it pleased me greatly.

Since the league treats 0-0-16 the same as 8-8, they could make the playoffs with that record.

I’m calling it now: The Browns are going 0-0-16 this season. 

Kickoffs should be eliminated from along with the rest of football.

Putting clothespins on power cords to save money by keeping electricity from escaping as waste is one of the stupidest fucking things I’ve ever heard. If people who believe this have kids that go to your kid’s school, you need to find your kid a new school.

Nike’s actually selling the shirts he was supposed to wear at this year’s U.S. Open for $100. As Deadspin’s Giri Nathan said in Slack, “this is like pissing on his grave.”

Nike’s actually selling the shirts he was supposed to wear at this year’s U.S. Open for $100. As Deadspin’s Giri…

INSTEAD WE WILL SPEND OUR AUTUMN SUNDAYS IN OBLIVIOUS JOY SIPPING SPICED PEAR GIN FIZZES WATCHING PEDRO ALMODOVAR MOVIES

typo— Fixed it.

I made a word cloud of everything the fans wrote

Show me a state that blows millions on crap like this and ranks in the bottom ten in all educational metrics and I guarantee it's a red state.

In Alabama this counts as spending on education. 

I hereby solemnly swear that if I ever become an owner of a team, I will finance my own stadium. And food and drink prices will be reasonable. And parking will be free. And tickets will be affordable. But I will charge people extra if they insist on standing during the anthem.

In other words, they really are like a real automaker now

Seriously.  

The clearest message that I get out of WYTS every year is that attending an NFL game in person is a fucking horrible decision and only idiots do it.

I’m with you on this. If I was a Braves scrub, I’d go ham on the first guy I found and activate his dental plan.

Eight months later

In case you’re serious, that’s usually shorthand for “someone of Jewish ancestry and ethnicity who may or may not observe some or all of the rituals that define them as a people but isn’t into the whole God thing.” This happens when “Jewish” can mean a religious group, a cultural group, an ethnic group, or a kind of…

I’m pretty sure this dude also owns multiple fleshlights shaped like an AR-15 barrel.

His lineage is Jewish, his beliefs are atheist.