Last night, Rachel Maddow in the middle of reporting on it just stopped and said, “By the way, yes you are awake. You did not die and go to hell. This is real, it’s actually happening, this is America now. This is us.”

Doesn’t it feel weirdly planned, or like a bad movie script?

I like how he assumes that this isn’t something a lot of women already thought of, and then discarded as utterly impractical/ offensive.

Nope. Dead on.

You know that moment where you are like no, no, I really need to buckle down and get my work done and then you are all- a quick scan of Jez won’t hurt. Lesson learned.

“Can you believe how many shitty airports I’ve had to hang out in that don’t even have caviar and hooker service? Why isn’t THAT a campaign issue, I ask you?”

Fortunately you don’t get to phone a friend in a presidential debate.

I literally still can’t listen to the Dean scream because it still breaks my heart. TOO SOON.

Somewhere a childless (by choice or not, ain’t nobodies busniess) Jen Aniston sleeps till 9:30, gets a massage and is enjoying a HOT coffee in her 2 million thread bathrobe from the GOOP site when she glances down to her iPhone 7 to a text from her BFF Courtney filing her in on the details. Jen calls to the help to…

right?!? like...all the other celebrity divorces im all “another one bites the dust ah well” but this one. I just wanted them to shit all over everyone’s expectations and be the most amazing philanthropic couple of ever.

By the Sea was their Gigli.

I am also really not okay with this news. I was really rooting for them and their crazy brood! I wanted to see fabulous photos of them when they’re 80 and just living their best lives in France.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Sure, she’ll be there 250% because she sees an expiration date. (I really am cynical. Shit.)

mmmm define ‘literary’

I *hated* “Eat, Pray, Love.” My husband and I had just started dealing with the serious illness of our son when that book came out. We were organizing all his care, drowning in medical bills, fighting the insurance company, constantly worrying and crying over it all. I read the book for escapism, but that backfired…

I mean, come on. There will be a book and probably a miniseries.

Oh you’re gonna see it.

Oh, for fuck’s sake, lady. You’d better be there for her 250%, and I better not see a fucking book out of this.

Gilbert is the epitome of navel-gazing thirst.