“I ride a bus, mom.”

Should've been "mimosa" obviously

Guess Ben was genuinely sorry, cause if he were just acting sorry, he wouldn’t stand a chance!

like a Spiritualized concert, all light show and dissonance.

Fuck Rubio, he is by FAR the least offensive candidate physically. Marry Trump (gotta get that paper), kill Cruz (IF THAT’S EVEN POSSIBLE).

Okay but the LOGISTICS of “Hitler’s stupider more xenophobic cousin” and that “guy who you almost took a ride from but was too creeped out to and then later saw his face on the news with a story about how he was murdering hitchhikers and burying their bodies on his farm” HIGH FIVING WHILE THEY PENETRATE YOU FROM BOTH…

If you gangbang Cruz, Rubio, Carson, and Trump and they all drop out, you get your face carved in Mount Rushmore.

Couldn’t agree more. I’ve read comments on Gawker say if Bernie doesn’t win the nomination then they aren’t going to vote in November, or worse, they’re going to vote for Trump just to piss off the establishment. Yeah? You suck and never held the values and ideals that Bernie had then. You just rode the coattails of a…

Call me old fashioned, but if my boyfriend went on Instagram and said something about me that included the phrase, “The pussy good. . .” I would like to think I’d immediately dump him.

Self-Proclaimed Democrats / Progressives, get your shit together now. Like, NOW.

Do not cry. Please do not cry. I promise you that this is so much better than Cruz. I know it seems like cold comfort but when it comes down to narcissist buffoon vs dictatorial sociopath, I’m going with the buffoon every time.

As a teacher, I can’t see any possible outcome in which teachers aren’t blamed for not doing stuff right. If you shoot the attackers, you turn against some of the kids you teach. If you don’t shoot them, you fail to protect your students. If you didn't bring your gun of great justice to school that day, you're…

Okay. So the models right? they’re all on this island and taking pictures but also trying to be a survivor. And they’re naked and afraid. But also there’s this bachelor, right? Picking between them and it’s this amazing race to see who will be his wife. Swap that location halfway through the season and put them in…

the dark green deep plunge? oooohh my god give it to me

I think I would have the smallest modicum of respect for these douches if they stopped pretending to apologize and just OWNED their terribleness, ya know?

Ummmmm

500 days of American Ninja warreir??? would watch 1000/1000

I’m updating right now. However, I’m really struggling on the qualifications so i was forced to put down the time I climbed the monkey bars in 4th grade as my experience in the Ninja Warrior Action Sports (TM) field.

Tease, tease, tease.

i have unlimited access (well, when i’m in california it’s unlimited) to david campbell’s private training course, does that give me a leg up on the competition?