The Loon Boat

“You’re all Promethean spirits,” she said gently. “You’ve all awakened, and you’re shining your Uranian light into Pluto’s underworld.”

This is just a convenient way to get rid of conspiracy theorists because they’ll all die after the cruise ship sails off the edge of the earth.

Yep! We got an email from a lovely commenter being like, “Send Anna on this thing” and my bosses were like, “OK” and I was like “wait I was mostly kidding when I said I wanted to go and wrote a pitch” and they were like “No, too late,” and I was like “....” and then I went.

Anna, you’re braver than me. I would have tossed myself over the side by day two. Fascinating piece, I really like it. I’m just sort of overwhelmed by sadness at some of these people who bought tickets on the cruise, and a sense of anger at those like Wakefield who prey on them, even if they truly believe what they’re…

“Once we’re in international waters, every woman on the ship gets to make love to whoever she wants,” Sean David Morton said, with a wink.

I’d marry him if he promised our first born would be named Ican Has Cheeseburger

Something to consider before you immediately say “hell no:”

He totally just needs to meet someone named *Emily HoldtheLettuce*.

Then they could do the hypenated thang.

If it were just him and I on an island.. he’d be married to his hand.

I’ve heard his fiancée Wendy is actually looking forward to a future with a few Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers

“My mum was furious but my dad thinks it’s hilarious.”

This isn’t really the same but my all time fav. is Traylor Swift:

Methinks this guy will be holding his own pickle when that wedding night comes around.

A quick Google search confirmed my gut reaction: Florida.

Still better than Crystal Metheney.

The only Bacon I would is Kevin Bacon, but he's married so that's out.

First photo looks like she just realized she agreed to sleep with Donald Trump to save America.

“So before we move in together, you should know that I want it to be an open marriage. In fact, I have a long term girlfriend. I want you to meet. I think you would really like her, and I hope we will be happy together.”

‘I like you too much and I can’t concentrate when I’m playing guitar’ - said to me by a high school not-quite boyfriend.