This is me tomorrow at 1pm when I leave work for 8 days.

Jeter bringing those red-hot negotiating skills to bear on Marlins Man

You’re not going to get rubes with an excess of disposable income to give you money with that kind of attitude.

Thankfully TB12's water regimen protects him from sick burns from Coach Belichick as well as from the sun.

Maybe Lavar thought it was the Balltic League?

What league is that team in?

I hope the agent enjoys his ten percent off these contracts. And that he does not smoke all the cigs in one day.

As much as I hate that family, you have to feel sorry for the kids. Imagine being taken out of school and sent to the eastern bloc. That can’t be easy.

Well, there’s sitting on the stoop crackin’ wise, but yeah, that’s pretty much it for NYC.

It’s going to work, isn’t it? By virtue of being a loud mouthed asshole with a couple of sons who may or may not be good NBA players LaVar Ball is going to get rich.

I’m pretty sure it’s just LaVar in a series of ridiculous disguises that don’t work.

I’ve reread this three times trying to figure out if you think Geno Smith went to Western Michigan. You don’t say it, but then what is the relevance of Western Michigan to your buddy’s opinion otherwise? Why not say “My good friend has great dental hygiene and has been saying FOR YEARS...”? Baffling.

You were thinking that maybe details of the Mueller investigation would make for juicy blogs on Deadspin, were you?

There were 3 shooters in the JFK shooting: Oswald, the grassy knoll, and a squirrel in a tree on Dealey Plaza.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STOP READING. LET THAT BE THE ONLY THING YOU TAKE FROM THIS ARTICLE.

After watching the video, my takeaway is that I’d rather have those two chinese fellas call a game than Reggie Miller.

Just as Darrell Bevell drew it up.