Tom Brady agrees to forget about the whole thing as long as someone, anyone, gives him a high-five.

You actually completely misquoted your own quote. Yes, being in the top 30% is “one of the better” as quoted, as opposed to your “one of the best” statement that came “out of left field.”

All my dyslexics live in Texas.

Two of them, in fact. Turns out that’s not quite enough motivation for me to get behind turning our schools over to Deion Sanders just yet.

Unfortunately, most climate scientists predict that these metaphors will only get stronger.

“Typical Deadspin liberal bias. We need more forward thinkers like this young woman.”

And good lord, what is he eating?!

Now Cutler can focus on throwing to his favorite receivers... The other team.

I choose life.

We have whole houses here devoted to them.

Any idea if they have plans to make the streaming service available for people without cable? I’ll happily pay for it, but not for everything I’d currently need to get it. Are there other legal doesn’t-require-a-VPN options that I’m missing?

May Men in Blazers live forever.

“Uh, yeah- these doves are a total health code violation.”

Jesus tapdancing Christ... How do you manage living on that island? Everything is trying to kill you AND waffles “aren’t a thing”?

A kitchen directed by John Woo

I’m pretty sure even the U of M would have a hard time shutting down the story if they blocked out the Star Tribune because of it.

If only the editors of the Star-Tribune had a way to hold this guy accountable by shining a light on his behavior when they first learned of it.

Has anybody?

Then you have never seen an Eagles fan blow a .099.