Ashley, have you reached out to ICP or any juggalos to get their feelings on the clown outbreak? Are they proud? Annoyed? America needs answers!

Because we live in a society that values celebrity above expertise and takes sports far more seriously than politics. That’s why we have a reality t.v. star running neck-and-neck with a career politician for the presidency.

so weird that cuomo’s name is always linked to all of these corruption scandals AMIRITE

I’m going to do a rare comment here and speak for the Shark. Costs a third of what a Dyson does and is tough as hell. I’ve had my Shark for 2 years and noticed no depreciable difference. I love it so much it makes me worry about what this passion says about me as a person.

I bought a vacuum at Walmart for $67 when I got married and used it for 11 years. How big is Steve’s house and how often is he running that thing?

I’m still stunned every time someone says they eat Subway.

Rachel, you’re not real, stop trying!

For those of you looking for it, here’s the passage in question:

That was my thought, NFL refs in general as bad as they can be are normally aware enough to avoid tossing a player from a game for a lewd touchdown dance. Theyd proabably “miss” is or just assess a team penalty.

He has become quite a colossus in the secondary.

Sorry, Odell - the Rhodes are closed.

When Beckham hauled in a short out route for four yars, Rhodes hit him on his way out of bounds.

take it easy, dad

It means you lost 9-3 to the Rams so sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up.

They drafted women in the 60's???

There are zero Cubs fans on this staff. Samer is a Red Sox fan.

So you really just long-conned Samer into the ultimate splice? Well done!

But seriously, Boston fans are fucking awful.