still not as much as he cost Rhode Island

No he’s in St. Louis, not Cincinnati.

I can’t believe George Lucas drives a motherfucking Jeep.

Its as if Roethlisberger is being held down against his will.

You guys found something more depressing than Drew Magary’s twitter feed.

His blind faith of his concussion curing water may have hurt/killed someone.

this is one of those games where I have a moral quandary—to root against the child abuser or the godslinger?

As a Maryland fan, I was cursing that awful terrible horrible no-good travesty of a final shot... up to the moment it went it.

I’ve argued that, actually, Kanye’s a better lyricist than Kendrick Lamar.

I was with you until you said Chris Kluwe.
Nah, man.
Nah.

The thing I love most about that tweet is that it suggests—correctly— that a cocktail waitress is as reliable a source as a sportswriter when it comes to verifying whether someone in a bar is Johnny Manziel.

Yeah, look at those muscular arms, that buff body. Also, to impersonate manziel, you’d have to humiliate yourself with that godawful haircut and be willing to pass yourself off as an alcoholic liar.

Christ, just cause you’re really good at these extremely difficult panda puzzles doesn’t mean you need to be a dick about it.

Everyone plays better when they leave the Bears.

That would explain Peyton’s gigantic melon.

At this point, Scott Walker will take ANYONE getting hired in Wisconsin as a positive.

He wanted to make sure he had plenty of time to get to Who-ville and steal all their Christmas presents

Don’t be absurd. That was a macaw.

I’m pretty sure it is not because his son microwaved a live parrot to death.

He’s going to a 311 concert?