Chik Fil A is closed on Sundays

“Numerous players, from different teams, wanted to show their “outrage” at something that most of them are unable to define.”

This whole Space Force thing is getting out of hand. Check out Donald, Kellyanne, and Jeff in their new uni’s...

it seems like a bad sign when someone in a long-term relationship is surprised by the breakup.

2-1 odds that LW#1 wife has a side piece. Going out to the clubs and concerts without your SO with that flimsy of an excuse is exactly what my brother’s wife was doing to him before she finally came clean. Leaving that abruptly/refusing to even see if counselling would work. Sorry guy!

I think a lot of young men grow up with the healthy notion that there are no such thing as leagues, and that people simply match up differently and this includes different tastes in physical appearance. But then one Sunday afternoon, they’re skipping channels on the TV and happen upon A League of Their Own. Unable to…

I’d rather it go into history’s anus.

thats lord disick, hannah.

(i.e. one offensive tweet cost Roseanne Barr her TV show and reputation.)

I’m really glad that I grew up before social media. Heck, when I was growing up, our computers had 5-1/4" disks and monochrome monitors. I had to use one disk to start up Word Perfect and insert another disk to save it.

Does JDepp buy his jewelry by the pound?

The Red Delicious apple—which went uneaten, as Red Delicious apples are not food

If your friend says “fat upper pussy area” in a professional setting, s/he is not a doctor and that is not a *medical* community

Similarly, I dress like Hitler when I need my gutters cleaned.

As someone in Information Security.

This is not what you do.

I gotta admit, that makes it sound pretty classy. “ExCUSE me, I do NOT ‘fap it to Bigfoot’. I am a devotee of Bigfoot erotica, thank you very much. You make it sound so... tawdry.”

The candidate’s name?

Hahahahaha no. There was no treatment. The young men who were subjected to near-constant bombing and the ubiquitous threat of gas would get PTSD so bad they had actual seizures. Only then did military doctors consider there might be something wrong. They named it ‘shell shock’ and it’s the first known diagnosis of…

Oh right, I loved that one.  I was the person who was sort of on the fence about the vasectomy while I was pregnant, it was my husband who was gunning for it!  And yet, of course, I’m the man-eater who should have also gotten my tubes tied so I showed the proper “commitment” to not having children...

I fucking hate her.