Strip Club Idiot here!

It's hard to make out, but that amorphous blue thing is supposed to be a wildcat

After seeing her cake, Miko Grimes' emergency oral surgery doesn't come as a huge surprise.

THAT'S NOT WHAT YOUR MOM SAID.

"Hungary isn't known for churning out scores of soccer stars."

My favorite is the 76ers one:

Moron keeps making moronic decisions.

Yes, the fix is in for a Canadian team that's on national TV all of five times this season. Meanwhile, the league couldn't find a way to nudge a USMNT striker to an American team, in particular the one in NY he once played for.

"What is clear is why this is happening. Toronto FC were bought by big-money owners who wanted to make a splash. " Toronto FC has been owned by MLSE since day one. No change in ownership, just more of the same usual incompetent mismanagement as the Leafs.

Impressive but how far can he punt a football?

It took them three hits with the sword, and she was given nothing to dull the pain, such as painkillers. But that sounds really humane! Fuck western racism!!!

Roy Jones won silver

Literally every piece of this story is a treatise on why heavyweight boxing is dead in America. The author is proposing that a not very good fighter be fixed to beat an apparently thoroughly underwhelming current champ so that the only vaguely legitimate champ, after having beaten a washed-up has-been, can have an…

Update, 6:24 p.m. EST

I honestly don't know why the article has such a derisive tone.

Right? It's hardly a major social justice issue and I'm annoyed I even have to stan for these irritating little shits, but the UVA frats are 0% to blame for this mess and there was no good reason to suspend them. I don't blame them for feeling stung here.

Look, I have never been a fan of the Greek system but the school punished them for something that never happened.

At Nick Denton's wedding, one of the few images I remember vividly is Craggs grinding with his girlfriend up against a mirrored wall, completely shithoused, looking at himself in the mirror (tuxedo-clad, flawless, primal, sweaty) before looking down at her. Up and down, up and down, gyrating, shallow thrusts.

If Mozgov is the missing piece to an NBA championship, it may be time to disband the league.

'It's nice but not ignore-new-england-penalties nice' - Dean Blandino