It sounds like sour grapes, but I am very grateful (now that I am middle-aged) not to be a beauty. My grandmother was, and my mom and I always speculate that it kind of ruined her life.

HBC also has better taste in romantic partners, some of whom have also been helpful to her career. Unlike the unfortunate Ms. Vergara, who has shackled herself to an arsehole, it sounds like.

Given the horror with which I greet the inadvertent selfie view when I accidentally hit the front camera on my iPod, I think if I were constantly seeing similarly unflattering photos of my face in the press, I'd be going out with either a shit ton of make up on the daily or....

If he wants his look back, he shouldn't have left it in that public men's room.

Unfortunately, my indoor-poop-hating husband wouldn't allow housegoats. I KNOW they can jump as high as our bed; I was so ready to have nightly goat snuggles.

We have cows, guineas, geese, ducks, chickens, goats and two sheep (who are with us on, shall we say, a temporary visa. *wink, wink*). Vermont. It could be worse!

They were at the end of April, beginning of May, so pretty young. They are ladies, Schatzi and Beate, who will be bred in the fall of 2014. CHEESE WILL BE THE RESULT!!!!

We use killing cones and cut their throats. And by we, I mean my husband. I butcher, but let him do the actual killing.

Chicken poop is mad useful, once it's had a chance to cool off.

Nah, chickens are easy-peasy once they're out of the tiny-dude phase. Seriously. Make sure they have water, feed and some sort of clean bedding if they can't free range. Consider some electrified poultry fencing from Premier, which is lightweight and can be moved by one person.

Too lazy to see if this is mentioned elsewhere, but hens lay for much longer than 2 years. They just don't lay as many eggs. If you intervene and give artificial light in the winter time, I believe it shortens their overall egg-laying life. But we have a chicken who is 7 and who still lays several eggs a week…

Click on me! Can you see my goats????

Hmmm...I never thought of using my newly granted Kinja powers to that end. Good suggestion.

We just got our first goats about a month ago and I was completely unprepared for the shameless love-bombing they do. Goats rule.

I bet that man's heart resembles a piece of beef jerky.

Thank you! That ad is great!

Alan. Who names a doll Alan???

So much do I look for rings on "the all-important finger" that I am frequently the first person to notice someone has discreetly gotten engaged/married in real life. Oy.

Should you wish to see this gentleman naked, watch the streaming Netflix offering Canterbury Tales. Directed by Pier Paolo Pasolini. Could've knocked me over with a feather when I realized that Mr. Nudie in one of the tales is MY original Doctor.

Together 13 years, married 11. I'd say the biggest surprise/secret is that it waxes and wanes. Times where sex is almost unbearably hot, times where sex is almost unbearably absent, lots of shades in between. Our lives are so woven together at this point that I feel like sex isn't the glue that keeps us, um, glued.…