Yup yup yup yup yup.

I know you had to retract parts because of lawsuit concerns (or I'm assuming, whatevs) but everywhere that sells meals with tiger shrimp in them (which is most of the cheap shrimp in the US) uses slave-sourced shrimp. Source: studying human trafficking at a top tier law school. Eat that, Olive Garden.

Feminism? Fine. Whatever. Misogyny is a word that is legitimately necessary for women's safety.

Dear God I have no idea why I'm diving in, but here goes...

Very very very true.

I've been a Bill Simmons fangirl for a long ass time (partly because I'm as much of a homer as he is). He once wrote that Eddie Murphy's fame was partly what led to his downfall from the comedy peak, because he could no longer relate to common people.

SORRY SOME STATES ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN OTHER STATES, REST OF THE COUNTRY.

UUUUUGH DUDES. We get to hold onto our moral superiority because we PUNCH people, not stab them. MOVE ELSEWHERE IF YOU MUST USE WEAPONS.

Awww!!!! You're so effing cute to think that we pretend our cultural history started in the late 80s/early 90s.

I have very little hate for the south, outside of the racism (which we also have in the north, we just hide it better). But South Carolina isn't part of the South? Doesn't really any state (minus Missouri) with an SEC school automatically mean South?

....rednecks with shopping bags?

I must say I appreciate your ability to both stand up for your city and be a bit in on the joke. Well done.

I tried to play a game: do a shot every time a commenter on this post accused me of being from New York.

Those classes are always my faves.

I LOVE YOU WE REALLY DO NEED TO BE BESTIES.

I just figured that provel was a practical joke Wisconsin sent to St. Louis and you all were shocked when St. Louis actually ate it.

PIZZA THE HUTT!

When I went there, I was confused as to how I could be in a major metropolitan city and the only black people I saw were my cousins.

You write the Wikipedia entry, didn't you?

Nope.