As a vegan for more than three decades I have to say this is a load of tripe. Their words butter no parsnips with me.

Did those restaurants put raw rocket on their pizza as in your illustration? If so that could be an explanation. If not than you have committed a grave insult against their integrity as pizza chefs (or cheffes).

The phrase you were looking for is - they will PETA out.

Surely properly-balanced plant food is cheaper and contains just the right amount of nutrients? Most houseplants would welcome potassium salts rather than sodium salts in their food. If you want to spend a few extra pennies a week to treat your plants, get some organic plant food from your local hydroponic shop.

But...

And Hamlet 2, of course.

So intolerance is OK if directed at those of us trying to keep a little fit and not split our stomachs open with excessive meals? Anyone thinking this was fat-shaming needs help with understanding narrative.

In Latin excelsior simply means “higher” or “towering above”. It was Longfellow whose poem of the same name in 1841 used it as an adverb with the implication of “ever upward”. When challenged on the error in grammar Longfellow suggested it should be regarded as representing the motto Scopus meus excelsior est,…

So they could do a series where he is in a block of ice, a cocoon, in pieces on a mad science lab bench, trapped in a time loop, a vast room full of aged clones, petrified, changed into an energy being and seen in dozens of parallel dimensions.

Strange Fruit

Yeast extract has a high content of nucleotides and free amino acids. The flavour profile will depend on the processing. There are a lot of different styles on the market. This one seems to be marketed to industrial food producers specifically for umami: https://biospringer.com/en/our-range/umami-yeast-extract/

The fifth is obviously aVatar.

Do you joke about murdering people a lot? Because most people I know would not regard that as a joke. When you “joke” about mistreating and killing other human beings for no rational reason it looks very like advocacy.

“Vegans are not a race or a gender or a sexual orientation or a differently-abled group. They just choose to eat plants.” So Giles Coren would be happy for people to advocate murdering Times restaurant critics? Preferably alphabetically by last name?

Charles Dickens remarked that Americans would use about one swear word in every three words. So, a great tradition in decline.

“Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.” ― John Lennon

She was fascinated by seeing her big, strong man in action. She wasn’t going to miss that.

Glowsticks are far too chewy.

But that would not have been funny. If you want to avoid grim and morbid: slipped on a bananaskin, knocked out on a clown’s nose and falling into a giant cream pie where you drown with one leg comically raised out of the cream.

Thankfully, browning hing mellows its intensity.