It is when compared to shit.

I’ll have you know my little sister was perfectly capable of writing her name while peeing. I don’t know how she did it. I don’t want to know how she did it. But she did it, and her writing was more legible than mine.

And here is where I ask, why do you Canadians pronounce it “Ca-Nay-Dian” if you’re from “Ca-Na-Da”? I don’t see anyone else mispronouncing the name of their country in their demonym.

I love turbulence. Love it. It’s the only part of flying that hasn’t gone to hell. It’s like a surprise roller coaster.

Most Trump voters don’t have a “fuck you, I’ve got mine” philosophy. They have a much stupider “fuck you, I’ll get mine someday as long as nobody stops the guy who is stopping me from getting mine” philosophy.

And, like all of Texas’ contributions to the world, a Mexican did it.

...Kelly opened the segment by bragging about how she doesn’t hit her kids...

Placed him there like a pubic hair on a can of Coke.

If you think Nolan ever had dignity you are confusing self-respect with self-conceit. 

Game hunting is just a cover for his search for proof that the Earth is flat.

My problem with this has nothing to do with the amount of food they are taking. I’m just imagining being stuck in line behind the asshole who wants to spend an hour stacking cucumbers.

The tent is temporary. They’ll fix it with a software update.

He’s also the embodiment of Greed. And Sloth. And Lust. And Wrath. And Gluttony. And Pride. And Envy.

My best guess is she thinks that getting rid of him would piss off their mutual friends and she’d lose everyone. Meanwhile, they’re only tolerating him because they think he’s important to her. Everyone hates him and they’re all tiptoeing around each other.

He is the guy who is hoping if he stays in her life long enough and is there at the right time, the right night, she’ll give in and sleep with him.

According to this song, the level of services available to homeless individuals in Oakland hasn’t changed much since 1994.

Derriericho.

May 1. To represent the 1/5 star reviews.