This is interesting b/c I recall a Buzzfeed video about sex that said 68% of men loved going down on women. Hopefully William Lloyd and his ilk are in the minority. Still, 1/3 is pretty big chunk.

I’m really trying to imagine what a Vegan Voltron would be like now.

Why hide it?

After hearing so many stories about “horrible restaurant customers” not tipping, being racist, and claiming to be allergic to colors and textures, a story about a pizza delivery driver being assaulted and robbed seems almost surreal.

Oh god, I can see it now. Hipsters who are into retro Playboy/Hustler pornography.

Not Canadian enough. No hockey or maple syrup. Still good though

He was on an old episode of wife swap. Another gem of his: “Bacon. Is GOOD for me.” You could probably just search that catchphrase and find him.

“Ask for a substitution and you get punched - either in the dick or the nuts or both.”

Gotta get the band back together!

Man, Jesus is up there on the cross in his drawers. How come I gotta wear a suit? If boxers are good enough for the son of God, they should be good enough for me!

“If we didn’t win, why do you deserve to get paid?”

Keep...Summer...safe...

With all that blood, they were probably after some Strawberry Smiggles.

Thanks to no fault divorce and Loving v Virginia, you can get remarried into as many interracial marriages as you want!

Ok, I’m confused. The first paragragh says that sentences for girls’ crimes are longer than boys, but then says they wait in detention pre-trail 5 days longer than boys. Aren’t sentencing and pre-trial detention different things?

Hands down the best Kitchenette story thus far. And “Leaking canoe of emulsified dick meat” is WAAAY better than “Monogramed thermoses” or “Allergic to X” will ever be.

“CAN I GET A KIDS BLOW JOB?!”

(Editor’s Note: This is probably my single favorite Revenge submission ever. Nobody can complain the food was messed with, nobody can complain the server did anything illegal or abusive. Perfect.)

If you’re into politics and/or philosophy, I highly recommend “The Reactionary Mind” by Corey Robin. It was a fun and informative read.

If you’re into politics and/or philosophy, I highly recommend “The Reactionary Mind” by Corey Robin. It was a fun…