This headline is insulting. I am NOT stupid.

Raisins are fine as a snack on their own, but there is not a single dish or other snack on earth made better by including them.

There is not a single person on earth, let alone an entire state, whose favorite Thanksgiving side is fruit salad. 

Do they have actual crucifixes and bible verses on them this year, or should I get ready for the annual crying from rightwing pissbabies?

Mac and cheese, ground beef, peas.

That’s kind of the whole point of this article...fi something “makes good business sense” but is horrible for the environment and the rest of us, then stricter regulation is a legitimate thing to pursue. It makes good business sense for corporations to dump their waste into the ocean, but we don’t let them do it.

I’ve always sworn by drinking out of the back side of a cup. 

So they’re just out here stealing ideas from Ron Artest now?

Imagine contacting your representative about a new law because your son--a senior in high school!--got scared reading a book.

What’s the old Disney (I think?) animated movie where an animal--maybe a lamb--is trapped on a mountain during a lightning storm? Lambert the Sheepish Lion maybe? Whatever it was, that scene fucked me up.

I don’t think anyone I knew was wearing FUBU until you could start getting it at Ross or Marshall’s.

I was going to listen to nearly every doctor and scientist on earth, but you know what...the guy who thinks the earth is flat and the domestic abuser who can barely read make some valid points.

I didn’t miss it, but I also don’t buy it. My entire point is that you can eat much healthier and ultimately more conveniently for a few bucks a day by buying groceries.

Under some extreme circumstances it might make sense, but it’s not the case here. According to a quick Google search, there are at least eight grocery stores within 2.5 miles of this Six Flags. It’s not even remotely a food desert. Also, you can shop, cook, clean, and package a week’s worth of healthy lunches in under…

The things some people do to save money astound me. If you really want to be frugal, you can eat infinitely more healthy—and ultimately more convenient—food for a few bucks a day. Scheduling your whole life around eating two meals a day at Six Flags is insane.

Philadelphia cream cheese is the only cream cheese that has ever existed.

I’m going full-size this year for the first time. Costco had a mixed 30-pack for $19. Two of those should cover me, but if I get more than 60 trick or treaters, I’ll just steal from my kids’ candy haul.

First (and foremost): This just says “important” twice.

Withholding a tip is your right, of course—but are you really teaching your server anything valuable, or are you just being an asshole?

For me if you keep it hip-hop, nothing can be taken away from Afrika Bambaataa. Nothing. Just keep hip-hop. But if you want to dig into dude’s personal life and accusations that’s being made and so on. Personally — I don’t give a fuck. Personally. Look, if somebody was harmed or whatever, y’all gotta deal with that shi…