...the much lower stakes of the Scouring of the Shire

after the ring is destroyed I don’t want to sit through watching the much lower stakes of the Scouring of the Shire.

“What can I do about super-loud kids and their oblivious parents?”

Whew. It took me way to long to find the correct take on coleslaw in these comments. I refused to eat it growing up because all around me was these mayo based heap of nonsense with cabbage laced in it (and why mayo and sour cream??).

I guess it’s the Slav in me but I vastly prefer the oil-and-vinegar coleslaw to mayo/creamy. It’s much more refreshing.

did you ever notice that tortilla chips come in windowed or transparent packaging and potato chips are sold in foil bags

these are the things that keep me awake at night

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

I ate like half of this batch so yes, I’d like some company.

She’s come a long way since selling purses to Dwight Schrute.

Steak: If it ain’t twitchin’ it’s overcooked.

It’s gross and creepy and feels weird and I hate it and there’s better dairy products in every direction you look, just make it stop.

“Johnny Fontaine will never get that movie, I don’t care how many dago guinea wop greaseballs goombas come out of the woodwork!”

Children would work the same way as they do today, you get them a prepaid card from 7-11. Hell my three year old has a prepaid card that we put money on so we can track his fun money purchases(even though we do the actual purchasing).

FWIW every state has different standards for consent to be recorded. In Ohio for example I can record any person to person conversation I have without disclosing this fact. I believe that there is a different standard for phone recordings and that you have to expressly tell the person they are being recorded - again…

I think it was just Adam’s go-to for just the most idiotic, overspecialized job possible:

Not sure if it’s a cost-cutting measure or if it’s just Americans getting dumber, but WOF (and Jeopardy for that matter) seem to be pulling from the Golgafrincham Ark Ship B recently.  

Why not embrace it and go full Wiener Circle?

Thank God something finally worked out for Oprah Winfrey.

Good tip on the scrub daddy. I ruined mine by being careless with a delicate man.

Just more evidence in how the Runaways people made a terrible call in assuming everyone hates Weird Al now.