@FIFA-Thespian-Federation: That would get me the prostitution speech.

After my latest 2 hour shoveling marathon, my wife asked me, "Why don't we just get a snowblower". Why? Because you're the financial wizard running this operation and you said we couldn't afford one. Does that ring a bell?

@UweBollocks: The only good thing about bumper nuts is that they can be used to teabag shady mechanics.

@UweBollocks: I think getting banned should be the Lifehacker challenge.

@Pedro Cerrano: U2

I feel such rage when TNT shrinks the game down into a tiny window so they can show me some nonsense I don't give a shit about. Save it for the timeouts.

@psybab: No clue. I didn't know it used to work that way.

Music Thread!

@sweatingmullets: I know all the words to Thank You for Being a Friend.

@psybab: I don't have a clue what it takes, but Len Bias Cocaine already has one.

@Phintastic: Project Runway. I do watch Glee, but I hate it.

Still no winner in the Fleshbot challenge.

@Kanley Stubrick: evil spell check.

@Sheed's Bald Spot: I see that now. If you do want in, I'll figure out how to mail 5 bucks to Brazil.

@Sheed's Bald Spot: Are you another one who's already starred there?

@tastes_like_burning: Yeah. Unfortunately, I wasn't fluent enough in anus lingo to get it. Thanks for the education!

I was once in a fender-bender that landed me earless in the trunk. ALWAYS WEAR YOUR SEATBELT!

@CBronsonSmile: No one said masturbating to earn a five bucks would be easy.

@Walk Off HBP: Sheed's Bald Spot is out. I don't mail to the southern hemisphere.

@7MinuteAbs: I haven't been there, but as for things to do there, I'd guess: Look at the ocean, look at the volcanic craters, lasso a flightless cormorant, look at the marine iguanas, tortoise rides, look at the land iguanas, and maybe eat some finch stew. Again, I'm just guessing here.