Heinz is the only ketchup that should be allowed to be sold. Drop some cayenne in it to spice it up and it's even better.

Funny, I was thinking ruined beer. Well, except for the High Life and Oberon, can't really ruin something already ruined.

Ill bet you a dollar Paul Little is a sneaker smuggler too.

This sounds like BMC Light beer with more hops.

You just don’t know the right older women.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say, yeah, dudes got issues. Especially after the latest charges.

Like that is a concern around Deadspin?

Don’t you mean President Bonespurs?

The estate claims that a 2013 recall of Farley bikes damaged the value of the Chris Farley IP

Nature’s perfect fish is trout.

I’m going to go out on a limb and guess he’s a standing wiper.

The masturbation test also works well.

Im curious as to what is in his purse.

My favorite play of the night was watching him get punched in the mouth.

however if he was an american i would probably loathe his existence

Next time you shit put your elbows on your knees and don’t let your ass touch the seat and you will have your answer.

Save the banananas!

But that says Vinnie! Jake is also illiterate so maybe it won’t matter?

Isn’t the proper nut temperature a few degrees below body temp?