This you don’t do:

NOT NEARLY EMPHASIZED ENOUGH:
Despite taking his shirt off, Harbaugh still wore full length khakis.

Previous television credits include To Catch a Predator, The Best of To Catch a Predator and Dads.

Peyton and Eli’s cousin Joey Manning

They tried

On a good day, I look like Walter from the Big Lebowski. Imagine that guy sharing the pool with the moms at toddler swim lessons in the morning and sitting in the room with dance moms in the evenings. Oh, I will always use the “parents with small children” parking spots, because the 30 seconds of ugly mutterings is…

How oddly appropriate that Snyder has chosen to leave behind him a trail of tiers.

We’ll see who is laughing when all my sweat is wicked away into the atmosphere.

“I Will Want What I Want” and “Go Where You Don’t Belong” are part of Underarmour’s new Darren Sharper “SharpMan42” product line aimed at cutting into Nike’s brand.

I always thought it would be awesome if the fans of Entourage and the fans of Sex and the City could be introduced at the world’s largest Brotastic/Basic Bitch Mixer, and then be shipped off to Wish Fulfillment Island where they could live out their lives as a never-ending cycle of roofies, brunch and credit card debt.

That's a shame. There haven't been enough guacamole/wasabi contributions to these postings.

I asked him today if he was a Beatles fan, and he replied that he heard they were good and intended to give them a listen in the future, adding that he really liked their song “Hotel California.”

What is “Hasa Diga Eebowai”?

That’s not a prank that’s a god damn war crime.

I once ate an entire wedge of brie knowing damn well it was brie

When I was about 9 I decided I wanted to make some brownies by myself, I had a box of Betty Crocker brownie mix and I start making it. Well, at some point I realized that we didn’t have any oil, we did however have a bottle of italian salad dressing. In my mind, I thought using the oil from the salad dressing was a…

♫ It’s time to give the finger!
It’s time to fight the fights!
It’s time to shit on Leslie ‘cause her Muppet ranks ain’t right! ♫

I’m in favor of resolving this as fairly and equitably as possible. Both Goodell and the Patriots need to be put on a rocket and fired directly into the Sun.

I don’t understand anyone who says that. I love eating ice cream, but if I have a heart attack while doing it, it doesn’t make it any less pleasant. I doubt that anyone would think to themselves, ‘Oh well, I’m about to die. But hey, what a way to go”.

“With this magic schedule, I can squeeze it in between kickball and cornhole!”