Thank you, Captain Solutions.

Good thing those 2 cops who were on the scene disappeared once the fighting started, they could have gotten hurt!

If video existed of the first time I put on a condom it would look exactly like this.

Is that another one of Floyd's assault victims?

Poor kid just did the Popcorn Bucket Challenge to raise awareness for kids with poor balance.

Game recognize game.

And what was his Achilles heel the year prior?

I lost a girlfriend to that. She caught it from some other dude. Now they're both dead inside.

No...he read the book.

It's great to see the former CEO of Microsoft using the latest in crumpled-up paper technology to access the notes he prepared for his big speech.

Some things can't be un-sucked...believe me.

Sounds like he's having some memory issues. Weird.

NumbParty 2014

f) he's acutely aware that the cocaine covered hookers are waiting impatiently for him

Maybe MLK was even smarter than we give him credit for. How easy would it be to plan a sit-in in Alabama? #slacktivism

You beat me to it!

It's a good thing Eric Bolling found an employer who is so dumbass friendly.

When in doubt ask a Cardinals fan.

Trust me, you don't want to know Oxnard well...or on any level.

Bless you.