Brings a new meaning to "hit the showers", I guess.

Parents became suspicious of Sandau's views when he started awarding gold stars to the team's worst, least coordinated players.

Slight alteration, between 9/11 and This I would add getting hit by a car.

In 2010 no less. For once in my life, I'm proud of this country.

She got 99 problems but a rich ass dad aint one.

Holocaust

Rich white women are finally getting a shot.

Jew Tang Clan

What they aren't telling us is that the best of the two gets a Cadillac ElDorado from daddy and the loser gets deported back to Malaysia

I never felt jealous of deaf people until I heard this song.

ABC

Welcome to Obama's America

That General better not have any ethics skeletons in the closet because this shit will get real in a hurry. I've seen the sort of things the senior officers in the military do and get away with that are blatant ethics rules violations that will make this Halloween candy drop disappear with the quickness.

"The Arizona National Guard does not authorize nor condone the use of military aircraft or equipment for personal use."

Presto Flo: Don't push me cause I'm close to the edge, I'm trying not to lose my hat...

Here it is, reversed.

Something like this I hope.

Oh man, I have a picture of her, RJ, and the man who eventually married and impregnated her and made the best child ever, where RJ is staring down her dress like it held the secrets to the universe while her and my dad are obliviously smiling at the camera. When I get home I'll try to find it to show you - it's…

Eh - not as funny/poignant as you wanted this to be.

Thanks, white lady.